A Good Escape Plan.

by Daunt 34 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  hybridous

  Daunt,

  You did the smart thing in avoiding baptism, you may be able to retain some relationship with your family who might otherwise shun you had you been baptised.

  You've noticed an overwhelming theme in the advise given...make damn sure you get your ass in school and earn your degree, and I will echo that, because it's the most important thing you can do right now.

  Take it from someone who's not a whole lot older than you and still wishes he concentrated more on college. Make college priority number ONE. There will be time for fun, girls, and parties along the way. Keep college as your focus, and you'll be glad you did.

  Metatron gave good advise as far as the family thing goes. For the sake of your relationship with them, you may have to throw them a JW bone now and again. If they're happy thinking you may come back to the JW fold, let them go on thinking that. If they ask if you've been to meetings and such, tell them what they want to hear. I feel no guilt in lying to people that were intent on having me waste my life for their lies....other people may feel differently, I'm sure.

  Do well for yourself. On some level, certain JW parents still feel pride when their kids do well in life, even if those kids are not JWs.
• 

  Daunt

  Thanks a lot Hybrid. Yes an education is the most important thing possible. However I'm going to wait on college for a while and focus on art school. That will train my artistic ability good enough to sell portraits to folks and be a concept/matte artists. And I understand how to seperate work and play. Well I hope, I never had too much fun before.
• 

  Disheartened

  Daunt,

  Just wanted to let you know that I wish you the best. At least you have money saved up-I didn't. You'll feel so much freer away from the KH. I'll never go back. I don't regret my choice to leave. Try and see if you can get a scholarship (if you haven't already tried). Sometimes financial aid will pay for housing (via dorm) and you education also. You may be able to get a grant you won't have to pay back. That way you can go to school right away. Again-I wish you the best!

  Disheartened
• 

  mustang

  "the pressure is just building up from all their JW reasoning and pressure and guilt trips and all that mess."

  Yes, been there, done that. Moving out won’t stop "JW reasoning and pressure and guilt trips and all that mess", but it will put distance between you and most of it. It also allows you to set your own rules and your own pace. That is most important.

  Also, whether you have the JW issues or not, it is natural to "leave the nest". As has been said before, ‘a man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do’. You have to be yourself, eventually.

  I moved out (2500 miles out!!!) and then moved around at the far end; then I went on night shift. It was a neat plan and I was proud of it. (This plan worked on everybody but my father.)

  But when I started missing meetings, my father heard about it!! BTW, JW’s had "networking" down pat before the internet ever came into existence.

  I had gotten a bit lax before I made THE BIG MOVE, and he had given me the "while you’re under MY ROOF, you’ll do as I say" lecture.

  He called me up and started telling me what to do (go to meetings, service, do more..) and I returned the favor with his lecture reworded to the effect of I’M UNDER MY OWN ROOF NOW!!!

  Sad to say, that only took the wind out of his sails for a short while. It took 30 years and a funeral to cure him; so be prepared for a lifetime of unpleasant interaction.

  Whatever you do, make an escape plan that fits you and do it!!!

  Mustang

  Here's to escape plans Class
• 

  Zapper_1

  I'm delighted that you want to leave Daunt, but I think it's a sad commentary on a religion that you need an "escape plan" to leave - a good reason to do so, with or without a plan.