Close family members who are disfellowshipped........

Tracy

Has their stand on this suddenly received "new light"? My teen received a letter from my mother telling her they(she and my sister) would no longer be associating with me (her mom) but that she could still come to visit the several states away!?!

She blubbered on about how her conscience was bothering her everytime she had any interaction with me. A Great 3 page letter to send to a 13 year old... [yes but we know honey that grandma has . . . umm . . problems and we make allowances for her]

What is the current stand? And are they doing some pressuring currently to explain this letter from out of the blue?

Tracy

former #philia member

moanzy

I think they may be "encouraging" the congregation to make a black and white choice. To totally cut any ties with disfellowshipped family. I don't know for a fact, but that would be my take on it.

Moanzy

EvilForce

They used to allow a "little" slack in talking with family members. However with the new "bOrganization Book" they are becoming more hardlined again. No discourse for any relatives unless and underaged minor in your own household.

The flogging of the sheep will continue until we see that morale imporves.

Dismembered

Welcome to the JWD board Tracy

They (jdubs) still have the "don't have anything to do with them" mindset. Have your teen tell Grandma to go flush her head, perhaps that will help "clear her conscience". Shame on Grandma for sending such a letter.

The beat goes on Tracy.

Dismembered

"Don't you go dyin' on me now"

Bonnie_Clyde

Does the new organizational book even take a harder stand on DFing than the Kingdom Ministry from a couple of years ago?

blondie

It all depends on who you are in the pecking order. I know of 3 elders who regularly associate with DF'd children. When other elders were asked about it, the publisher who asked was told that the elders were aware of it and it was only necessary family business.

It is hard to say if the elders in her congregation became aware of her minimal association with you to see your daughter and counseled her or if she heard a general talk and applied it to herself without mercy. I know of a sister who babysat children, and babysat the child of 2 DF'd parents and had plenty of interaction with them.

The key I guess is not advertising it and keeping it under wraps and stay under the radar.

I would not let my daughter go see her JW grandparents without my being there and be careful of any phone calls/letters that undermine your parental authority.

Blondie

doofdaddy

Personally I don't give a rats arse what jw's are saying now in their literature ( or whenever) that is a truly sick letter to send to your own grandaughter. The poor child... My advice for what it's worth is find another relative or close friend who can mentor your child and show her what unconditional love is about. That's what a real grandmother stands for.

blondie

Doofdaddy, you are right. JWs are treated with abuse, spiritual abuse and are taught to do the same to others and call it love. I'm sure the grandmother is misguided. Not that it hurts less. It would be worse if she did it on purpose to hurt, and some JWs do use their religion as an excuse to club family members, while they are hypocriitally violating their own group's rules.

Tracy, just talk it over with your daughter and help her understand that her grandmother is misguided. But I would still watch your daughter's association with your mother without badmouthing her. And be assured that your mother will try and bring your daughter over to her way of thinking invading your family's rightful boundaries.

Love, Blondie

Honesty

I feel sad for you and your daughter. Your mother is just following misguided orders and would probably be a very nice person but for the WTBTS. I feel very sorry for her that she is denying herself the love of her family for the sake of an apostate religion.

Emma

My family has always been about as hard-line as you can get. Even with out my being da'd or df'd there's the most minimal contact.

My mom used to plead with me to let my kids come and spend a couple of weeks with her, but I would never allow it. The would have been carted of to meetings, field service, bible studies, be studied with themselves, etc, a lot of damage in a short time. One of my kids would have easily fallen into their thinking because of personality.

I wish they would have had grandparents and aunts and uncles, but it was too dangerous.

Close family members who are disfellowshipped........

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