Just thought I'd share these items with you... they made me laugh anyway!
WEARING THE TROUSERS
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Anne Jonsson of Stockholm attacked her husband Lars - leaving him with a fractured skull, broken nose, a damaged cornea and various cuts and bruises - when he refused to take her to a rally against domestic violence. Guardian 8 Nov 2000
EMERGENCY MEASURES
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When John B Henderson, the chess correspondent for The Scotsman, landed in Seattle at the height of the foot-and-mouth crisis, UK customs men confiscated his haggis. They took it out to the middle of the runway and shot it five times before dousing it with petrol.
Scotsman, 17 April 2001
MESSY BUSINESS
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A parachutist was blown off course and ended up in the middle of a coleslaw wrestling contest in Samsala, Florida, on 7 March during a motorbike festival. Two women were about to wrestle in a pit of cabbage and oil when the skydiver landed on barmaid Sherri Lee who was carrying a tray of beer. Lee was hospitalised in serious but stable condition. [R]8 March 2001