CHRISTMAS CAROLS FOR JEHOVAH'S WITNESSES

Mastodon

I must say, I feel pretty proud of these little songs I just wrote, feel free to share them and spread 'em around!!! To the tune of ?Santa Claus Is Coming to Town? You better watch out, you better look out You better behave, and I?m telling you why The Overseer is coming to town You best be getting? busy Preachin? door to door You better do the best you can So that Awake! Sales keep going up You better not pout, you better not doubt You better believe what the witnesses shout Armageddon?s coming right now Doesn?t matter if you?re good Doesn?t matter if your?re fair If you are not a Witness You will get eternal death You better hide out, don?t make a sound You better not answer the door when they pound The Witnesses are coming to town! To the tune of ?Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer? You know Russell, and Rutherford, And Knorr, and Franz, But do you recall the most Famous brother of all Rudy the red-nosed elder Came to all the meetings drunk He would spike all his lectures With a little splash of scotch All of the other elders knew about his little ?touch? But they never said nothing ?Cuse he would give ?em rum and coke Then on a boring book study The Overseer came and said: ?Rudy you have been drinking but I drank more in Bethel? So Rudy the red-nosed elder Kept drinking more and more Until was he unconscius While he was driving home? To the tune of ?12 days of Christmas? On my 3 week as Witness the elders gave to me, 12 private meetings 11 days of preaching 10 bible lectures 9 dirty looks 8 home visits 7 good examples 6 days to answer 5 times their burden 4 days for repenting 3 shady answers 2 phony accusers At the end they disfellowshipped me!!!

Mastodon

damn, sorry people, it didn't post like I wanted it to, let me see if I can fix it

whyamihere

That was really good!

I loved it!

Brooke WI

Mastodon

HOPE IT WORKS NOW

To the tune of ?Santa Claus Is Coming to Town?

You better watch out, you better look out

You better behave, and I?m telling you why

The overseer is coming to town

You best be getting? busy

Preachin? door to door

You better do the best you can

So that Awake! Sales keep going up

You better not pout, you better not doubt

You better believe what the witnesses shout

Armageddon?s coming right now

Doesn?t matter if you?re good

Doesn?t matter if your?re fair

If you are not a Witness

You will get eternal death

You better hide out, don?t make a sound

You better not answer the door when they pound

The Witnesses are coming to town!

You know Russell, and Rutherford,

And Knorr, and Franz,

But do you recall the most

Famous brother of all

Rudy the red-nosed elder

Came to all the meetings drunk

He would spike all his lectures

With a little splash of scotch

All of the other elders

knew about his little ?touch?

But they never said nothing

?Cuse he would give ?em rum and coke

Then on a boring book study

The Overseer came and said:

?Rudy you have been drinking

but I drank more in Bethel?

So Rudy the red-nosed elder

Kept drinking more and more

Until was he unconscius

While he was driving home?

On my 3 week as Witness

the elders gave to me,

12 private meetings

11 days of preaching

10 bible lectures

9 dirty looks

8 home visits

7 good examples

6 days to answer

5 times their burden

4 days for repenting

3 shady answers

2 phony accusers

At the end they disfellowshipped me!!!

Mastodon

THNX BROOKE! See? now it looks better

BrendaCloutier

Mast, that's awesome! Good job.

Don't forget the ...(brummie dots)...

Hugs and Happy Holi-dots

Brenda

morty

That is toooooo cool.....I LOVE IT...

Merry Christmas...

glitter

LOL very funny!!

Don't forget that Kingdom Melody "Myriads of Brothers" that sounds EXACTLY like "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer"!

Listen here, HO HO HO

Mary

Deck the Halls with brain-washed Christians,
Fa la la la la la, la la la la.
Tis the month for our assembly,
Fa la la la la la, la la la la.

Don we now our best apparel,
Fa la la, la la la, la la la.
To hear a talk that's really awful,
Fa la la la la la, la la la la.

See the yapping Bro before us,
Fa la la la la la, la la la la.
Telling us that Dateline's bogus,
Fa la la la la la, la la la la.

Don't be fooled by his dumb lecture,
Fa la la, la la la, la la la.
Get on-line where you'll find treasure,
Fa la la la la la, la la la la.

Oxnard Hamster

Heh heh heh. Great work.

CHRISTMAS CAROLS FOR JEHOVAH'S WITNESSES

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