When They aren't "Attractive"

by simplesally 25 Replies latest jw friends

  • Maverick
    Maverick

    Very interesting topic. Funny thing is I was thinking of a story idea about a society of people that were ugly until they hit 30 and then they started to get better looking until they died. How would that kind of life effect a person, a culture?

    I was in an accident while very young. Trac scar, scars across my chest, smashed my face, it was reconstructed in stages. I had over 30 operations, braces twice, speach therapy, bone graphs, skin graphs, I could go on....

    I'm not ashamed of my scars, I earned them and lived to take on whatever else life want to do to me.

    My ex girl friend had a stoke while she was a small child, her left side has some paralysis and her left arm is withered, I never noticed it after our first meeting. I though she was very pretty and sexy and her goofy walk was kinda cute.

    Many of the guys I know can't get pass things like that. Many ladies can't either. I say F*ch them!

    My daughter is scary beautiful and while I'm proud to show her off I don't think it is in her best interests sometimes. Mav

  • jwbot
    jwbot

    What is considered beautiful is so subjective (to contradict what an above poster said). It varies through generation and country, culture and region and age. In addition to that, someone who looks happy or portrays an air of confidence, in general, looks better.

    That being said, I think that no matter what one looks like, there is someone that thinks they are beautiful.

    I do not always feel beautiful, I have my moments. But Mike always manages to make me feel that way.

    It is too bad not everyone grows up with that type of positive reinforcement. :(

  • StinkyPantz
    StinkyPantz
    That being said, I think that no matter what one looks like, there is someone that thinks they are beautiful.

    Agreed.

  • FlyingHighNow
    FlyingHighNow

    Ezekiel, your experience reminds me of the movie Shallow Hal.

    Thank you, Sally for a beautiful thread.

    Flyin'

  • DanTheMan
    DanTheMan

    I've known plenty of women and men of whom I am 100% certain that they would not have been considered physically beautiful by the standards of any generation, country, culture, region or age. And you have too.

    smile

  • Scully
    Scully

    Dan, Dan, Dan.... whatever shall we do with you??

    I have seen during my career that even the homeliest baby is considered beautiful by its mother.

    Love, Scully

  • simplesally
    simplesally

    My point of the thread, I guess is more what Joan Rivers said about the scars on one's minds that are inflicted and how these judgements effect personalities.

    Someone being told over and over they are unattractive, ugly or deformed, like........"hunny, you can't enter a beauty pagent, you're too fat (or you have a big scar)"........Or my parents always trying to control my sister's weight which just caused her to eat more.....

    Mulan 'gets it'........because she was NOT told or assured of her looks, look how that effected her for her whole life!

    The thread was not meant to judge beauty but what we say, what we don't say, how we look or don't look at people..........The things we could do to make our little space in the universe better or worse.......And a private pm'er........he gets it too.......Much love to you, your pm made me cry at work for you and the little girl and her parents.

  • harleyquinn
    harleyquinn

    i know what you're talking about, sally....my husband is a 'big' guy and i've had people, who don't know how wonderful and kind and funny he is, ask me 'why did you marry someone that looks like that?'...it's a society of savages, frankly...and some people are so shallow that they only see the outside....

    also, have you noticed that you can meet an 'attractive' person who either says or does something completely abhorrant to you? you then can see them for the 'ugly' person that they are....i learned a long time ago never to judge a person by the way they look...i would have missed out on knowing a lot of really great people if i had...

  • simplesally
    simplesally

    Harley........yes, I have met some people, who I would not have considered 'beautiful' by the magazines........especially old people. I remember my first ex was appalled I would invite some of the older sisters to our 'gatherings' when he thought it was a party. Gosh, I had the best times. I used to go out on 'dates' with a man over 90 years old and he was sooooooooo handsome to me because of the gentille nature he had, the manners, the old fashioned-ness of his personality........ these people have hugely impacted my life in that I can see how all people can offer us joy and pleasantness, wisdom and humor to our lives. I have had friends that are handicapped because of polio (2 women) and we joked about their limitedness when we'd have drinks. I also spent time in the hospital with them.

    A physically attractive person who thinks the world belongs to them because of their looks has been done a disservice. They are missing so much because people gave to them based on looks rather than smarts or skill. This effects the way they treat others and they, too, become mean if people never notice their brain...........and that happens too. Pretty people sometimes play up their dumbness because that's what's expected.

  • avengers
    avengers

    Simple Sally is not as simple as one might think at first glance.
    Good post Simple Sally.

    Andy

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit