Single Woman

by pudd 9 Replies latest social humour

  • pudd
    pudd

    Single Woman A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected a half-gallon of 2% milk, a carton of eggs, a quart of orange juice, a head of romaine lettuce, a 2 lb. can of coffee, and a 1 lb. package of bacon. As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier. While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly stated, "You must be single." The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was equally intrigued by the derelict's intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off her drunken observer to her marital status. Curiosity getting the better of her, she said, "Well, you know what, you're absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?" The drunk replied, "Cause you're ugly."

  • LittleToe
  • Maverick
    Maverick

    Cold, very cold!

    When I was married, I used to carry a picture of my, very beautiful, young, So. Cal. Redhead wife in my briefcase. When people saw her picture they always commented in a surprised manner that I had a very beautiful wife! It used to piss me off! Know why? What they were actually saying was, " I'm surprised a short, ugly guy like you has such a beautiful wife!" Mav*

    *I've been told, by a number of people that I look like Steve Buscemi

  • frenchbabyface
    frenchbabyface

    It's funny but still very cold indeed !

  • LittleToe
    LittleToe

    Maybe it's a Brit thing, but I found that hilarious.

    It's the kind of thing that you'd never say in public, but is self-depreciating enough to be accepted as classic humour.

  • simplesally
    simplesally

    Who is Steve Buscemi?

  • pudd
    pudd

    Some have told me that I do not have a sense of humour. However my best brined and I have the ability to find ourselves falling on the floor laughing uncontrollably while others look on in confusion just not getting the point! Humour is a strange thing!

    My husband and I do not share the same sense of humour at all but he once told me a joke that had me giggling for days; A man walks into a bar??.. and said ouch!!

    This joke about the single woman was funny for the same reason; it plays a trick on the mind. I in no way think that ?ugly? woman are a subject to make fun of, I am no oil painting myself.

    Hope it didn?t cause ant offence!

    Pudd xxx

  • GenericMan
    GenericMan

    Steve Buscemi is an actor who was in alot of movies, especially movies by the Cohen brothers and Quentin Tarantino. He's not a good looking guy and for a woman, its not a good thing to resemble him.

  • StinkyPantz
    StinkyPantz

    OMG that was hilarious!

    You know how you sometimes type, LOL, meaning laughing out loud, but you don't actually laugh out loud? Well, I did. That was great!

  • Elsewhere
    Elsewhere

    LMAO!

    OMG... that is soooo cruel... but FUNNY!

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit