atheist + religious couples

by doogie 6 Replies latest jw friends

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  doogie

  hey guys,

  how many are in relationships where one of you is either atheist or agnostic or whatever and the signficant other is strong in their faith in God?

  My girlfriend is catholic and a good one too. her faith has helped her through all sorts of stuff and i think that's great. she goes to church pretty much every week and i'll go with her sometimes. however, i'm not so much 'religious' anymore. i'm a pretty spiritual person but as far as faith in an absolute God figure and the bible as His/Her infallible word goes...i'm still sorting that stuff out (in the wake of the troof).

  anyway, from time to time we have problems with our differences of opinion and i was wondering if anyone had any experience/thoughts/tips dealing with a situation like this. i know it must be fairly common especially since many here might have a sour taste left in their mouth towards organized religion.

  laters -- doogs
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  Sirona

  I'm Pagan, so while I don't attend church I do attend pagan gatherings etc. and I do believe in God/Goddess. My hub is pretty much agnostic and shys away from anything religious.

  I think that the only way it works is by having respect for each other's views. The religious one cannot push their beliefs onto their partner.

  Most ExJWs don't like the idea of organised religion, but some of them have a belief system and might meet up with those who share their beliefs on a non-committed basis. There is no problem with that. There are many Christians on this board who don't attend a christian church.

  Sirona
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  Gretchen956

  I think that the only way it works is by having respect for each other's views.

  amen, sister.

  The only way ANYthing works in the relationship is with respect. You both have to know that it takes different people different lengths of time to discover their path, to decide to have a path at all, or to just be one with their path (lol)... When these disagreements crop up in a relationship its usually because of a good motive, one gets so much joy out of their spiritual experience they want to share it with the person they love. And it is a wonderful thing to have the same spiritual direction, it can be very sensual in some respects and can intensify the connection. But it isn't required in order to have a connection and many many marriages thrive without it.

  Guess you just have to tell them you appreciate them wanting to share their religious experience but you need to find your own way and you need to have that journey be one they support you on, no matter which direction it leads.

  OMG! I think I'm talking about communication here! lol, something I'm not always good at myself!

  Sherry...
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  doogie

  one gets so much joy out of their spiritual experience they want to share it with the person they love. And it is a wonderful thing to have the same spiritual direction, it can be very sensual in some respects and can intensify the connection. But it isn't required in order to have a connection and many many marriages thrive without it.

  well, that's good to hear. me and my lady have a great relationship and i personally think it's even better because we have different opinions about spirituality (we bring such different perspectives to the table). in our case, we kind of both respect each other TOO much. she feels silly expressing her faith to me. for instance, she believes in the active hand of God directing lives today and blessing people. i don't, so she doesn't really express herself when she "feels it", you know what i mean?

  "The problem with most marriages is communication...too much communication." -- Homer
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  wordlywife

  My husband is JW, I'm not and never have been. Mutual respect is how we make it, although I think he does try to push some things on me from time to time.

  I have to admit that I was hoping my husband's 'joy" in being a JW would be so wonderful and so apparent when I first started attending with him that I would see it as wonderful also. No way, no how. I did pick up some things here and there in the talks (never anything much from the WT), but the rest I just cannot stand.

  I'm still sorting out how I feel about organized religion too. Most times I just feel a certain something when I see I a beautiful sky, or a plant or a child.........then the feeling is gone. I never feel wholly blessed, religious, pious or anything while in church, or a KH. I only feel something when I'm outside experiencing nature.
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  ColdRedRain

  Mine is. Not only is she religious, she's a religious fanatic. She's obsessed with the endtimes, and she thinks she's a prophet.

  I still love her though.
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  StinkyPantz

  When we were first married I was df'd but still believed in the JWs and hes an athiest.