First Year Blues

MelbaToast

This really doesnt have anything to do with JWs, but I needed to vent.

I am going crazy I think...lemme just blurt it out. My husband and I just had a baby last December and we're having problems

or not. I cant decide.

Do you ever get a "wierd" feeling in the bottom of your stomach like something is wrong, but you just cant pinpoint it? Thats me. Hubby loves me, loves the baby, I love him, we're happy......

But I feel bored, kinda like the seven year itch....btw, weve been together 6 years. We don't argue or fight. Actually on both of our parts there isnt much dialog going on...we talk, but he seems the same as me right now...bored. I don't know what to do really. This is the longest relationship I've ever been in and we have never had problems before. PLEASE someone tell me Im not nuts, actually thinking about getting on meds again (is it my problem?)

frenchbabyface

(((Melba)))

Well ... really I don't know what to say by now (no enough information and even with more information)

But Damn' you Baby is Cute !!!

As far as you love each other there is a way to get back to normal ...

MelbaToast

He names Johannah...Hannah for short....thanks, she is a cutie and such a happy one too. Heres another pic with her glasses, thats my hubby holding her.

Bubbamar

Hi Melba

Sorry you guys are bored...hard to imagine with a baby that cute!!! Anyway - I would recommend a Harvile Hendrix book - Getting the Love You Want. It explains a lot about what goes on in relationships and offers great exercises to bring romance back into the relationship. If you like the book you can also find an Imago Therapist to further help you.

Good luck and congrats on the beautiful baby!

Country Girl

Hey there --

Babies take a lot of energy and attention! I truly believe there is something to the "seven year itch" scenario, and I think it's merely a phase that a couple goes through, and gets over, or not. It may seem boring, but you can liven it up with some weekends away together, shared interests, etc. just as long as it's done with the intention of spending time with just the two of you. We're in our sixth year now, and I wouldn't call it boring, I'd just call it settled and mature. There's not that high like when you're first married, but in a way it's more secure and comforting. We don't fight alot, either, but we're not as passionate as we used to be. That's alright.. I had enough drama in my first marriage.

If you feel like it, see a doc and see what they say about depression. That migh tbe what's happening. See a counselor, that always helps, and find one that you really like and can relate to. Also, exercise really helps with the mood. Sorry I can't offer more than that.. but change always seems to help me alot.

Country Girl

MelbaToast

Bored with Hannah? No Way. Shes a light in my life, always keeps us hopping. Nah its more like "I'm so freaking tired" ( Im going to school also to become an RN) I think that maybe my hubby is getting a complex about my schooling. Everyonce in awhile he makes a statement like "once you become a nurse, you'll find someone better than me" I get tired of reaffirming to him that I am not going anywhere, plus the bs of "poor me" is irritating. Then I chide myself, thinking I am not doing something right, maybe I am not paying enough attention to him......

and the circle continues.....

frenchbabyface

Thanks for sharing your pics !

We can't see her face on this one but the sun glasses with her supa smile made it all funny ! (precious picture)

wish you the best

frenchbabyface

"once you become a nurse, you'll find someone better than me" I get tired of reaffirming to him that I am not going anywhere,

Ok this is a hint ... that is called the Wolf syndrome
it doesn't help ... you need a consellor Quick (as others told you already)

plus the bs of "poor me" is irritating.

More over ... cause less you get into the bulshit of "poor me" and more he will feel abandoned ... and more he will feel the need to make you feel guilty and bab ... and make sure that you see the difference in between him when he felt great with you and him when he feels bad (because of him - and he knows it unconsiously) with you.

Of course I'm not sure of that but ... A CONSELLOR CAN HELP HERE I think

MelbaToast

YOu know what is really weird.....this crap wasnt happening before HE was put on effexor and I think this is a side effect....hes mentioned that hed like to get off of the med (for other reasons) but it helps with his anxiety management so much!!!

*stuck between a rock and hard place*

MelbaToast

BTW, thanx for all the support, frenchy and others! Its great to go somewhere where I feel understood.

First Year Blues

Share this