Suggestions?

by Billygoat 4 Replies latest jw friends

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  Billygoat

  Okay...I have a 19 year old brother that was born and raised JW. He's currently a regular pioneer that is 'hanging out' with a sister that has a worldly reputation. He hasn't gotten into trouble about it yet, but I anticipate it happening soon. According to my mother, he really loves this girl and has already proposed to her. Here are the problems:

  1. He's still living at home.
  2. He has no job.
  3. My parents are scared to death he's going to get DF over this.
  4. Keep in mind, he's a RP. Parents are supporting him.

  When I've talked to my mom, I've tried to tell her NOT to do the things she did with me. (Control my whereabouts, minimize my feelings towards friends, tell me that field service is the answer to lack of faith.) I want to be of help to my brother, but am scared to approach him. He's 10 years younger than I and I've been away from the family for that 10 years. He doesn't really know anything about me other than I'm his disfellowshipped monster sister.

  Any suggestions on how I can help without being looked at as an apostate? I don't want to scare him or my parents for that matter! Although my mom is still a very active JW, she respects the fact that I am now a successful worldly adult that has experiences to learn from. We really have a pretty decent relationship.

  Anyone? Anyone?

  Billygoat
• 

  LDH

  OH. MY. GOD.

  19 no job living at home a reg pio. This is one of the saddest things I have ever seen.

  Maybe you should just encourage your little brother to take a few classes at college, or invite him to come and visit you for a while--with your Mom's blessing. Have Mom tell him he needs to travel, anything to break the cycle of field service and meetings.

  The important thing is to get his head out of the Borg's ass before he gets choked to death on all the #*$&.

  Lisa
• 

  Billygoat

  What is so sad is that my kid brother is an amazing human being! He's gorgeous, incredibly smart (top 2% of his class!), and has a heart of gold. I want him to come live with me, but not sure how to broach the subject. I don't think he'll come because he won't want to leave the girlfriend, whom I have ABSOLUTELY no objections to! She's a doll. Worldly, but by those standards, still a sweetheart!
• 

  AlanF

  That's a rough one, Billygoat (BTW, why that handle?). You certainly don't want to screw up your relationship with your parents, or with your brother, so you have to be very careful. To avoid the moniker of "apostate" you have to avoid saying anything overtly against the Watchtower organization. You don't have to be nearly as careful saying anything negative about the Bible, God or individuals within "Jehovah's organization". They will "understand" that you're now a worldly person and will likely make allowances. But if they get the faintest whiff that you know something about the JW organization that you can't get from the newspaper or from regular WTS publications, they'll smell "apostate" and likely shun you.

  The best approach, I think, is to be alert for situations with your brother where you can talk a bit about things that, if he investigated, would cause him to come up short and spark curiosity about why JWs believe what they believe. What you say depends entirely on his and your background and interests. If you have an interest in science, that's an excellent way to go, since the WTS teaches a lot of nonsense with respect to it.

  LDH's suggestions are excellent. Beyond what we've said so far, I think we'd need more detailed personal info in order to make more specific suggestions. What are your and your brother's areas of interest, so so forth?

  AlanF
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  Yerusalyim

  Pray for him, tell him to GO OUT AND GET A JOB OR GO TO COLLEGE. Sheesh, Jesus was in his 30's and had supported both himself and his momma for at least a few years before he started his ministry. Chances are he also worked to support himself between preaching trips too, as Paul did. A preacher who hasn't had to deal with the real world problems of the work-a-day world have NOTHING to offer me.

  JMHO
  Yeru

  YERUSALYIM
  God is truth, and light his shadow.

  Plato