does therapy work?

by doogie 12 Replies latest jw friends

  • doogie
  • doogie

    sorry, i don't know what i'm doing here...

    i was just wondering if post-JW therapy works. i have never been in therapy or counseling of any kind ever, but i really think i need something. i've been depressed before and i feel like it's coming back and coming back strong.

    does therapy really help? i'm a guy and thus i have a hard time believing that i can't solve this on my own. i don't know why i'm having such a hard time convincing myself to just go and talk to someone, but i am. if anyone has any good experiences with therapy or felt the same aversion to it that i do, please let me know.

    i'm dying here.

    thanks -- doogs

  • Bubbamar

    I've spent a lot of time in therapy and it has made ALL the difference! I think its only a tool - it helped me with my recovery - but the responsibility was and is mine. I'm just saying don't expect a miracle cure - it will help if you have an open mind and go into it wanting help and willing to do the emotional work.

    I understand your manly desire to do it all on your own. I wonder if you would feel the same way if you had a medical problem...wouldn't you go to a medical doctor if you needed medical help?

    You could just try it. You could commit to 3 months of therapy. If you hate it and don't see any value to it - you can drop out and be miserable again!

    Also, it's okay to shop for a therapist. If you don't feel comfortable - try another. Sometimes they will say things that you won't like - that's different. Its important to feel safe and understood.

    Good luck!!

  • franklin J
    franklin J

    based on my experience; YES.

    If you feel you need it; DO IT... and STICK WITH IT, until you feel confident enough to walk will not regret it.

  • doogie

    thanks bubba. it's just that first step that's hard, you know?

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    Counseling can help but it really depends on finding someone you feel comfortable with and what you put into it.

    It requires that you are honest with yourself and the counselor.

    Most people are taught that you should be able to handle most things yourself but if you had a broken arm would you try setting it and casting it yourself? Well indide something feels broken. We weren't the one to cause the problem and sometimes it is helpful to get outside help to deal with it.

    Like most things sometimes it is easier for an outsider to see the bigger picture than for the person standing inside the picture or just stepping out of it.

    A good counselor will not tell you what to do but rather allow you to sort out the direction you need to go in.

  • proplog2

    Therapy does work if its the right kind and the therapist really has to know what's going on. Otherwise it can be just another religion.

    Avoid therapy that tries to explain your problems by things people did to you. This will keep you an eternal victim. Find a therapist that will help you toughen up by getting you to think rationally. Some people need medication. Your therapist will work with a psyhiatrist to see if you need medication. If you are suicidal you most definitely need to get medical help immediately. BUT- medication by itself is NOT the complete answer. Many get medication and neglect the "talk". Neglecting the "talk" part will make you a slave to the medication. Your objective should be to get off or reduce the medication if your psychiatrist thinks you can.

    If you are able to love and work to support yourself and you are NOT suicidal you probably can get by reading some good therapy books and do self-therapy.

    My favorite therapy is Rational Emotive Therapy. Started by Albert Ellis. Lots of books by him.

    Next to that its good to look into personality types. If you can discover your "type" through Myers Briggs or the 16PF this will help you manage yourself better.

    I would also encourage some kind of Eastern Meditation to quiet the mind.

  • poppers

    I would suggest a therapist grounded in transpersonal psychology.

  • poppers

    Another suggestion if you want a sort of "self" therapy approach: Byron Katie's book "Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life".

  • Big Tex
    Big Tex
    does therapy really help?

    Yes, if you're willing to do the work. You get out only what you put in. In all honesty, I probably would have ended up killing myself if I had not gone into therapy. I lasted nearly 7 years before I got to the point where I could take over. Having said that, it was the hardes thing I've ever had to do in my life.

    Lady Lee is very correct in that finding a therapist is a lot like dating. The first one you see may not be right for you. Trust your gut.

    But basically, you sit around and talk. A good therapist will guide you to the areas you need to look at, and just realize going in that you probably won't want to face those things. It's tough, but it can be done.

    Good luck.

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