by Xena 22 Replies latest jw friends
I enjoyed this thread. Thanks Xena.
The repercussions of my childhood abuse have affected me for so many years ... Yes, I blame the WTS and my abusers for destroying/stealing the first half of my life, but NOW it is my responsibility to heal, there is no time for bitterness. That, imho, would destroy my soul.
talesin
As I grow older, I feel much more personal acountability for the actions I take and for my view towards the world.
I still hold my parents accountable for not having the wisdom to see that raising a child in this cult creates long-lasting psychological and emotional harm. When I ended up taking responsiblity for my life and leaving the JWs, I went through a great deal of emotional pain, and my parents only exacerbated it by trying to make me fear somthing bad would happen to me (well, mostly my mom).
As a parent, it is hard for me to forgive my parents for not having my best interests at heart. My mom was so wrapped up in her own little world, that she didn't bother to notice what the religion was depriving us of. We were disallowed normal socialization, with nothing really to replace it.
Being a parent has caused me to go full circle, I guess. We're all a victim of our past bad experiences, but it's how you productively deal with it, instead of continuing the cycle is what matters.
I personally think people often put too much emphasis on accountability. What is done is done, all you can do is move on...
However... There are situations that do require someone to be held accountable. In these situations, I think that knowledge of the facts play a large part. For instance, in the organization, the Governing Body know the facts. I am quite sure in the fact that they know that they are not "anointed" as God's mouthpiece. They do not pass on the facts to their followers. This, to me, means accountability.
To make a slightly more obvious (yet unrealistic example, which I just thought of as slightly funny, so I wanted to add it)...
Imagine a sick mad-man was on the loose with a ton of explosives. He wired them up to a large building, and ran a cable down to a wall in the hotel below, with a red button attached to it.
Shortly after the madman walked out of the building with his maintenance uniform on, a hapless newlywed couple came walking by the button. The man laughed at the plain red button on the wall. A little intoxicated from the champagne a guest to their wedding bought them, the man asks his wife "What do ya think that is for?" The wife giggles and replies "I dunno, why don't you push it and find out."
He pushes it, and the building collapses.
Now, in my little story, there are about 4 people that are (at least) indirectly involved. First, there is the madman, who knows exactly what will happen. Then there is the groom, who would not have pushed the button if he was more sober, but was he accountable for the deaths of all those people just because of his curiosity? The wife, was she accountable because she encouraged him? Then there is the person who bought them the champagne, was he accountable, as it wouldn't have happened without him?
The obvious answer is the madman is accountable, because he was the one who knew what would happen.
This does not, however, mean that one can easily plead ignorance (and this is where the grey area comes in)... What if the button had a sign that said "this will blow up the building"? The man could have easily dismissed this as a joke, as it is very unlikely. But still, he had the fact, but wasn't sure about it... it is at that point we can be held accountable for something if we assume something is / is not so.
So, IMHO, unless finding out who is accountable is useful, then it is best to just carry on as best we can. Sometimes... no single person can be held accountable, and other times, everyone is accountable.
FMZ
