2004 Walk With God District Convention Program

by TweetieBird 21 Replies latest jw friends

  • confusedjw
    confusedjw

    Dan - where are you? How about a sign "I'm trapped inside a huge python"? JK

  • exjdub
    exjdub
    "I'm trapped inside a huge python"?

    bwahahahahahha!

  • Elsewhere
    Elsewhere

    10:20 Nothing Good Held Back From Those Wanking in Faultlessness

    That's righ folks! If you are having difficulties, it is YOUR FAULT for not being good enough!

  • Undaunted Danny
    Undaunted Danny

    Dan - where are you? How about a sign "I'm trapped inside a huge python"? JK

    To:JK I'm inside the Christian Catacombs of Rome smack in the belly of the beast.

  • drwtsn32
    drwtsn32
    Congregated to Let Jehovah Teach Us His Ways

    OCR error... this should read: Herded together to let the organization brainwash us.

  • stillajwexelder
    stillajwexelder

    OCR error... this should read: Herded together to let the organization brainwash us.

    ROTFLOL

  • Satanus
    Satanus

    Bend over, jehover! That has a nice ring to it.

    SS

  • Mary
  • Mary
    Mary

    Wow. Our program is a bit different than yours............

    FRIDAY

    "WALK THIS WAY" ?Aerosmith 1:1

    Morning

    9:30 Ga-Ga Music

    9:40 Song No. 42 and The First of Many a-Boring Prayer

    9:50 Sit Your Asses Down

    Congregated to Let Senile Old Men Teach Us Their Ways

    10:20 Nothing Good Ever Came From Any of these Damn Assemblies

    10:50 Song No. 160 and some Boring Announcements

    11:00 "Keep Proving that it was 586 BCE, not 607 BCE"

    11:20 Let Us Be Your Guide Into The Pit

    11:40 Keynote Address:

    Walk With Us in Turbulent Times Will Get You Nowhere Except the Welfare Office

    12:10 Song No. 29 and Intermission, Thank Christ

    Afternoon

    2:00 Music to Star Wars

    2:10 Song No. 86

    2:15 Are You "Faithful in What Is Least"? If Not, Let Us Try Deprogramming You Again

    2:35 Symposium: Hosea?s Prophecy Helps Us to Fall Asleep

    Avoid Ungodly Roadways When Crossing the Border from Mexico into the USA

    "The Ways of Jehovah Are Upright", But That Means Nothing to Us

    3:35 Song No. 117 and time for a Bomb Scare Just to Wake Everyone Up

    3:45 Do Not Put Apart "What God Has Yoked Together" Unless You are Certain You Can Get Away With It

    4:10 Showing Respect for Our Sacred Gatherings-------Bring Your Own Sheep

    4:35 Good News for People of All Nations, Except Iraq

    5:05 Song No. 14 and Closing Prayer Thanking God There's Only Two Days Left of this Shit.

  • logansrun
    logansrun

    Looks like they'll be getting an updated "Good News For All Nations" booklet. You know, the one they use on foreigners. Man, if I was a dub I'd be pretty damn dissappointed. "All I got was a stupid booklet I can't even read."

    Bradley

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