"It's like a person who is in a relationship, but afraid to be alone. So they go out to find another person to be with before deciding to leave their spouse or significant other. "
The one thing I had to get straight with myself when my last marriage ended is the fact that I will always be tied to that dumb ignorant biotsh for the rest of my life because we have kids together. I had to learn tolorance of her stupidity, because it is very hard to seperate her from her bs. Because of the kids, I have to find ways to deal with their mother in a patient and understanding way.
I have risen above all the JW crap she spouts at me. I have helped the kids to secretly roll their eyes and smile when she begins to ignorantly beat them emotionally with urgent threats and pleadings to serve Jehovah so that they do not die at the big A. I know it will never end until the biddy learns for herself "the truth" is a lie.
Because I was so burned by this woman, I was so hurt and betrayed, and because she was such a liar, I thought very carefully about what I would settle for next time. In fact, the night I met my current wife, I was just telling my friend, Eric, that I was finished with women and marriage, that I would rather be alone than settle for some controlling, angry, vindictive, ignorant dork . . . "then along comes Mary" to prove me wrong. We met that night and have never left eachother's side.
When I left the org, I had to make my mind up that I was done with it too. I had to tell myself that you might not ever find a faith that is completely 100% true and accurate. I simply came to the point that I did not need another place to go to, that remaining in my head and my heart and my family were sufficient enough to experience God's love and protection. I Had no other religion to go to, for being a Witness meant that I was made to look hard at the other religions and see that they were mostly false as well. I don't want those either. The Witnesses are sort of like dealing with my ex-wife; they will alway be around, and I will always have some tie to some of them for one reason or another, therefore I must learn to tolorate some of their crap perhaps indefinitely. But they are people, and what else can you do?
You can make your thoughts, beliefs and opinions known to them and take a firm stand. If they think you are merely "doubting" or "spiritually weak" they will keep coming at you in an effort to "herd you back into the fold". Just as we tell our children about "good touches" and "bad touches" from adults, letting them know that certain parts of their bodies are completely of limits, we have the power to let JW's know that our hearts and minds and our spirituality is completely off limits to them!
Corvin