Bid Farewell to Guilt and Regret.

by Blueblades 8 Replies latest jw friends

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  Blueblades

  Everyone's past is filled with regrets, mistakes and missed opportunities that still cause pain.These feelings are an index of our humanity, evidence that we have a heart and a conscience.

  But from an emotional point of view, they are deadweights that keep us from moving forward.While they can't merely be willed away.I recommend you give yourself a good talking-to.

  Remind yourself that everyone has negative experiences.But whatever happened is in the past, and nothing can change that.Holding on to the memory only allows the damage to continue into the present.

  From the April Ladies Home Journal page 82. Yes I do read articles in my wife's magazines.I thought this piece might help some of us here on the forum.

  Blueblades
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  Phantom Stranger

  I need a good pie recipe - anything in there?
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  Carmel

  PS will strawberry-ruhbarb do?

  caveman
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  Sassy

  This is so true Blueblades. I think we as xJWs find a lot of regret as well as guilt with decisions in our lives from the religion on top of the other normal things people have guilt and regret over..

  Sometimes it bothers me but I remind myself I can't change it. I remind myself to focus on the things we have control over.......and let go of the things we can't.. which would included actions in the past.
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  cyberguy

  Yes, ?blueblades,? we need to ?move-on!? This board has and is helping me with negative feelings! But you?re right! We need to move on! We can?t change anything, so why torture ourselves with self-guilt, when in fact our ?ma-ma? organization is really at fault here?

  Thanks for this post! We need to ?move-on!? Yes indeed!
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  lisavegas420

  Beautiful post Blueblades,

  Sometimes to be able to move on, we have to stand back first and look at the whole picture.

  Look at what you have now, what you had then, and what you can have and do in the future.

  Me: now = wonderful husband, 2 great children, 2 perfect grandchildren, the ability to pick my friends and how I spend my time, money, and thoughts.

  then = ...............I had my parents then and a sister, a few people that I thought were my friends. I was told how to spend my time, money and what I should be thinking and doing. So I didn't have to think for myself.

  future = any thing that I can imagine....

  which includes, a new grandbaby due any minute... My parents missed out on watching and enjoying my children as they were growing up. They are now missing out on their Great Grandchildren. I wouldn't miss this for anything in this world or beyond.

  Lisa
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  Joyzabel

  Wonderful thoughts, Blueblades.

  I like this one the best.

  Remind yourself that everyone has negative experiences.But whatever happened is in the past, and nothing can change that.Holding on to the memory only allows the damage to continue into the present."

  Right on, sistaLisa!!!

  Joy
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  Maverick

  There is an old saying, "Knowedge is knowing that fire is hot, wisdom's remembering the blister!" The "blisters" in life can make us wise, if we avoid getting bitter. We are allowed to have strong feelings about the drama that is our lives. We are allowed to feel those feelings. Once they have run there course it would be wise to have learned something from them. Every experience should be a lesson. Organisms like the WTS try to attach triggers of conditioning to our emotional lives by which to control us. Once we see what they are doing we can fight them and regain primary control back. Guilt and regret are hugh anchors and we need to cut them loose! Maverick
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  Sentinel

  William Shakespeare did say it so well:

  MOURNING IN VAIN

  When remedies are past, the griefs are ended

  By seeing the worst, which late on hopes depended,

  To mourn a mischief that is past and gone

  Is the next way to draw new mischief on.

  What cannot be preserved when fortune takes,

  Patience her injury a mockery makes.

  The robb'd that smiles steals something from the thief;

  He robs himself that spends a bootless grief.

  Some good wisdom here I think.

  /<