A few questions for a fence sitter

JV

What goes on at elders meetings? I'm curious, how do they know things that i've told people in confidence? What do they talk about, do that have a list of people and then talk about every single person?

imallgrowedup

JV,

As a non-baptised female, I was never an elder. However, I suspect they know things you have told others in confidence because whoever it was you trusted had a "conscience attack" and told them. I don't know your circumstances, but I hope that you will be okay after this breach of confidence. You've come to the right place to get your questions answered honestly. I wish you the best of luck.

growedup

P.S. Welcome to the board!

DanTheMan

Ex-elders have told me that they are gossip sessions.

Gopher

Welcome to the board, JV!! You're among people who really understand. Glad you found us.

What goes on at elders meetings?

I was never an elder, but was a ministerial servant and I did sit on a few combined ms/elder meetings. They usually meet regularly as a body, I think once per quarter-year. If there are special things happening (C.O. visit or a hall being built) then they'll have other meetings. The presiding overseer sets the agenda. They talk about letters the congregation secretary received from the headquarters. They talk about who should do what, and what are the "special needs" of the hall so that they'll fill up the time scheduled for "needs" in the weeknight meeting. They may talk about problems going on, although technically only the committee dealing with a "problem" individual is supposed to know the details while the presiding overseer knows the general problem so that if that same general problem arises again, he can inform the NEXT committee that their subject has a repeating problem (and should be judged more closely).

How do they know things that i've told people in confidence?

Because if you tell a JW something important, they may feel it's important to bring it to Jehovah's attention through the elders. I guess Jehovah wouldn't know if the elders never found out. Elders tell their wives congregation secrets all the time. If more regular JW's knew that, they'd keep all their information to themselves.

Do [they] have a list of people and then talk about every single person?

They do have a list of publishers who record time in service. But they don't have time to talk about everyone. They only talk about people having problems that need the loving, wise, mature guidance of the untrained-volunteer elder body.

Nocturne

Hey JV,

Welcome to the board.

I'm curious, how do they know things that i've told people in confidence?

There is no such thing as a private conversation among JW. If you tell someone something in private. It will come out. JW love to gossip, so whatever you told people in confidence must have been gossip worthy since it made it all the way to the elders.

dustyb

yep, noc is right, no such thing as private...especially if you recieve disciplinary action. plan on everyone knowing within 2 weeks.

Yerusalyim

A few questions for a fence sitter...Do you get splinters?