Welcome to the board ,
"If I leave my family will be torn apart". Do you want to live your life based on what your family want`s you to do ?
Or do you want to live your life based on what you want to do ?
Its your life and only you have to live it nobody else ,do what you want to do.
Your nearly 18 so make plans to adopt some of the good advice that`s already been given you here on this site ,don`t rush it ,take your time and plan your exit well.
I wish you well