Hi Cold Dodger,
I really enjoyed your post. In many ways we are similar to Mormons in that we too are UNDER CONTROL by a few men.
You asked the following
Tell me about what it is like growing up as a Witness. What is family life like? What are JW parents typically like? Share the culture with me and also, what is it like becoming a member of the JW church?
I can tell you from my own experience what it is like to become a JW. My mother became one when I was 16. She used to speak to me about all the bad things happening etc and being young and impressionable would chat with her about the bible etc. When I was 23 I made a decision to have a bible study. I was living in London at the time. I absolutely 100% thought I had the truth. I couldn't stop talking about my beliefs. At work, at home etc....I was an absolute zealot for about a year plus. I gave up my good paying job and moved back to my hometown where I earned peanuts doing menial work. But hey I had the truth!!!
However, the honey moon period soon wore off. It began when an elder pulled me aside and mentioned to me that brothers didnt grow beards. At first I was annoyed him telling me in other words to shave it off. But, being humble and actually then thought it was scriptural. I did a lot of reading into it and towed the WT BS line and followed the principle on grooming.
Being in a small congregation and constantly being indoctrinated with bad associations spoil useful habits, I didnt go out on the town with worldly friends. I dropped them all like hot potato. Oh btw. JW's do not have any groups in place to cater for children, young people etc. It is left to the individuals in each hall to do that, which on the whole is on rare occasions. So as you can imagine. Week in and week out, I was stuck at home, whilst all my old pals were going out and having a good social life. From the age of 23 till now (in my 40's), I cant say I had much of a social life. Yes the brothers organised a few get together s, some bbqs, walks, cheile dances etc which were great, but they were too far and few between.
As a result, I ended up drinking at home and have done so ever since. I was reluctant to get baptised as was beginning to see the control aspect and wanted my social life back. I told my mother that I didnt want to get baptised as felt I was jumping straight in. This was a few weeks before I was to be baptised. BTW JW's also do everything they can to bag a baptism....just like the Mormons ie love bombing etc.
One very early morning, I was having a lie in. It was about 9.30am. The brother who studied with actually came to our door. My mother explained to him that I didnt feel ready for baptsim. He persuaded her to come in and then came into my bedroom whilst I was in bed and stood there for an hour debating with me about how baptism is the right thing. Its Satan that is putting you off...this was expected blah blah blah. In the end I foolishly gave in and 2 weeks later was baptised.
After 12 more depressing months, I decided to move back to London. I hated being a JW in a small town having no social life whatsoever.. When I got to London, I went back to my old hall expecting the same attention I got before my baptism and at least have a semi normal social life which I always considered important. It was like being in a hornets nest. The hall was full of regular and baptised pioneers (basically anyone doing 40 plus hours a month in the ministry. It was full of cliques. If you were shy, timid, or weren't out in the ministry very often, you were considered week. Someone who only gave a token service to Jehovah. An expression very often used at our meetings and book study. Again, I rarely got any invites to social occasions, despite the fact I was in a very large hall.
That time in my life was hell. I fell into a deep depression, because I never felt good enough. I thought Jehovah had pushed me aside and was going to be destroyed at Armageddon. I got no practical help from the elders when I was needing some kind of support in dealing with tenancy matters. Just told to go out in the ministry etc
Once you are baptised....like yourselves, you are suddenly someone or no one. If you are out in the ministry all the time, or become a pioneer, ministerial servant, Elder....you are someone. You are no one....if not seen to be doing works.
It also depends on the hall. Some Congregations are very cold, some friendly and warm, some very clique.
It is only years after you become a JW, like the Mormons, you start to see things that aren't right. We studied a book called 'Revelation...its grand climax at hand' I was looking forward so much to studying this book and on a number of occasions had to conduct the bible study as was ministerial servant at the time. This book was full of what I would call craziness. What struck me most about it was that the society (aka watchtower Org) tried to explain every single scripture away. The obvious scriptures were fine. But when It came to the difficult scriptures and their meaning, they would say this date / books/pamphlets pertained to this or that scripture. I was like thinking....that is nuts!
Anyway, around about 1999/2000 I began searching the internet as everyone was beginning to get computers. A few years later, I came across this website forum and it was then that my eyes were truly opened. It wasn't just me had all these deep personal thoughts about my religion. Someone on their site mentioned Ray Franz's book Crisis of conscience. He was once a governing body member for many years who was disfellowshipped for eating a meal with a dissociated person. I managed to get the book out of the library and read it twice within a week. I was both shocked and angry whilst reading this book saying to myself...I knew it....it just bloody knew it. All the nagging doubts, all the reasons why I felt the way I did....was in this book.
Jehovah's Witnesses are a high control religion. I personally do not feel any liberty n Christ as a Jehovah's Witness. Yet as a Christian (which I tell everyone)...I do feel liberty in Christ.
My family and I still attend the meetings. I now keep a low profile....as it is now more about a social thing funny enough. My wife is very popular and has a huge circle of friends. Despite the delusion they are under, The brothers in my hall are very friendly and it is a very warm congregation. If I were to leave, it would turn my families world upside down.
So that's pretty much it I guess. Thanks again for sharing your own personal views Cold dodger and wish you all the best.
My apologies for not saying my name.....but am sure you are likely in the same boat in that you cant be found out, re facing the consequences etc.
TE
