by minimus 39 Replies latest jw friends
I tend to think that many JWs who joined the religion in their later years feel foolish or are embarrassed by their decision to become one of Jehovah’s Witnesses.
I’m not embarrassed by my years “in the Truth “ because I was raised from infancy to believe everything was God’s word and who are we to question Jehovah and his Organization?
Of course , I know better now.
I joined as a depressed and struggling single Mum and they convinced me God never intended for life to be so hard and all wickedness was going to end soon. Probably and most likely before my little girl even started school it was going to happen that soon.
My little girl not only started school, she left school got married had 2 children of her own and is now a grandmother!
That struggling single mum who was never going to grow old is now a great grandmother. It took me 30 years to realize God wasnt coming.
That’s the worst! We languish in the religion and time just goes by and before you know it we are OLD.
I was around 4 1/2 when mom became a JW, and at the time I couldn't figure out why certain things were happening to me, until much later. My mother was one of those JWs who would be very zealous for a while, then she would totally stop attending for a while. Then after some time would go by as an inactive witness she would start back being the zealous JW again. My whole life growing up was like this. There was even one time she actually threw all her Watchtower literature into the dumpster. Dad (never was a JW) and my younger sister went and dug it all back out again. I could never figure out that man, he didn't want anything to do with it, but then he would turn around and do stuff like that.
Whenever mom was what you would call inactive, I would be able to go to sleep peacefully. But every single time she would go back to those meetings, I would start having these awful and horrible nightmares. They always revolved around very graphics visions of death. At the time I couldn't understand why I was having those nightmares, it was so bad that even if I closed my eyes during prayer, I would see stuff. So I asked my mother why is it every time we would go back to the meetings these night terrors would wake me up. I can recall a couple of times where I woke up screaming from them. Her response was this, "Satan is losing his grasp on you, so he is attacking you in your sleep." Later my thoughts turned into something else, and it was, "If this is God's true religion, isn't he stronger than Satan, why can't he protect my sleep?" I had constantly prayed before I went to sleep that I wouldn't have any nightmares.
At the time I couldn't figure out the connection, until much later on when my own son at the age of 5 started having the very same night terrors as I had, and this was a major reason why I decided to research this religion that I was in.
Looking back on what I had endured with those night terrors, and the reason behind them was the Watchtower religion, their publications (the artwork), and their fascination with death and destruction at Armageddon.
No offense but your mom sounded quite erratic.
Born in's, perhaps, have little or no choice and accept ( sometimes reluctantly, sometimes complacently) the safety and comfort of family and social environment.
In my experience I have seen certain 'company ' elders adopt youngsters and 'groom' them to accept and follow the JW doctrines and traits.
Those who 'convert' ( myself ..) differ in that we actively chose to convert and leave the outside 'evil' world, depending on how good our mentors were who brought us in to the 'Truth'.
In both cases, the person who is convinced, against his will , remains unconvinced still... a ticking timebomb...
Those who were converted as adults have something outside to compare to jw life. Raised as a jw, being kept separate from people outside the congregation, leaves you with nothing to compare except the opinions of others.
minimus, Don't worry, she is a very toxic woman. It is ironic, getting shunned by that woman actually saved my sanity, and marriage.
Minimus, You have a point. Certainly I consider myself a fool as I was impressed by the cult at 28 and got Baptized at 30. I also dragged my wife into it, who is still in the cult.
Those who were born in, yes, I consider them as innocent victims, who never (knew) had an option and most probably got baptized at a tender age
Yes , I was 9 when I became an ordained minister
