Letter to my wife
Truthexplorer, if I were your wife, this would be my response to your letter:
First, thank you for your thoughts. I've often wondered if you ever had thoughts. (hahaha...this is humor; I wouldn't add this)
I was rather taken aback in the beginning upon reading that you are writing because you feel that " it is impossible to have a rational adult conversation" with me. Because the computer must have messed up, some of your words are cut off and I'm left to guess at what they say. If my guess is wrong, it will likely make it appear that I'm not trying to have the "rational adult conversation" that you desire, so forgive me in advance that I've chosen to not respond to much for fear of making a wrong guess and making it appear that I don't desire a rational adult conversation.
It would be wonderful if you could give me an example of what you consider to be a "rational adult conversation" and how I've failed in my efforts to fulfill that role in our relationship.
Your letter makes me feel that I've been placed in position of a Judge who is listening to a criminal who is representing and defending himself while possibly hinting that others and their policies are responsible for my feelings and actions. Unfortunately, I don't have the power of a Judge to release you, to sentence you, shorten your sentence, prosecute those who you feel are responsible, or to advise you.
So, giving up my Judgeship, I'll go back to the wife role. Dear heart, many of these issue, I agree with you. Like you, I can't change them. Like you, I can't change others; only myself. If I felt the way you are seeming to feel, I'd be very concerned that where I'm at isn't somewhere I want to be. Is there another place you'd rather be? Never can tell; it might be a place we would both like to be. Maybe in a place we could communicate with our voices and emotions?
If you'd like to discuss it, my schedule is always open for you. If I knew a short while in advance, there could even be some soothing, soft, gentle music and some refreshments.....as soon as I hang my robe. Hoping to hear from you at your convenience.
Your loving devoted wife
jwfacts- she wouldnt go to the elders with the letter as know her too well, though she did threaten to speak to my mother. anon 2....I liked your synopsis. should have mentioned i cut out parts of the letter to avoid things that might identify me re lurkers. my mrs can be quite argumentative when certain subjects are raised and she doesnt want to hear it. fingers in ears job, hence the letter as knew she would read it. cheers for thoughts though.
I like what cha Ching said!
Really work on showing her that life together can be awesome...once off the treadmill of Fear Obligation and Guilt of the witness life....
cha ching said, " I have seen the propagandized lines of the WT take people's brains over right before my eyes."- I have seen that too and it can be quite scary when you first see it!
I wish you well with the letter. I hope she reads it but worry that her jw-ism will kick in and she won't get past many parts. Is there one thing you could start with? is she willing to have an actual discussion vs the usual jw cut and paste/parrot the wt style? I know how hellish those jw 'discussions' can be and perhaps letters are the way to go. If she can manage to stay on topic.
Can someone pleaser lighten me about these 'branch correspondence guidelines' dictating about the beards? Surely they've not put stuff about beards in writting to the congs?
On the subject of the letter, well put and succinct. I too have had to write letters to my wife in the past which is astonishing as you just can't hold a conversation about such matters. Witnesses responses to such letters aren't always in line with what is actually written. Rather, a point blank refusal to take certain points on board.
My wife (through her own choice) doesn't know ANYTHING about the extent of mishandling of child abuse, the court cases, settlements, Royal commission. She just refuses to listen which tells its own story.
Good luck, you'll need it.
Hi Jambon, the branch correspondence guidelines (which ray franz described in coc as talmudic) says the following on page 20 under 'dress and grooming' - when replying to specific inquiries on clothing and grooming, the following references in our publications may be helpful. Provocative dress, w87 etc... Hairstyles w91 etc.... jewelry and cosmetics w91 etc...... The wearing of a beard g79 4/22, 27 -8; w75 8/15 500-501; w73 3/1,137-40; As can be seen, though this is a guideline, it does in effect become a rule, given the the boe WILL follow everything the FDS says! Ps thanks for your post. TE
^ really surprised about that. The grip of control gets tighter. lol. Crazy.