some thing i said..?

by zeb 9 Replies latest jw friends

  • zeb

    Has anyone had this experience. That once some contact is made with others here they never write again?

  • Xanthippe

    Do you mean by pm Zeb? Yes I've had people message me just once. Also new ones sometimes post only one time or start one thread. I think possibly they panic, wonder what they've done. It's hard coping with leaving a cult, trying to get their heads round the fact that we're just normal, not demonised apostates.

  • zeb

    never thought of that thanks.

    any others?

  • smiddy3

    Yes i`ve had that experience and when I think about it to be honest I think I`ve been guilty of it myself.

    I don`t believe it`s anything malicious on anyone`s part ,hell ,it`s hard enough keeping in touch with people we physically know let alone people in cyber space / internet people we have never met.

    however I do think maybe we should be a bit more attune to it ,as it can come across as rude or worse.

    And I take it you are talking about PM`s ?

    I don`t take it personal , and lets face it we cant please everyone in what we say or do .

  • Diogenesister

    Oh im guilty, I'm afraid. And its the weirdest thing but it's like I'm frightened of rejection. I have very low self esteem and I'm so thrilled when ever I get a pm, or any friendship overture, in fact. I think, though, if they get to know me they won't like me so I am afraid to persue it.

    It doesn't mean I don't think about the person, sometimes very very often.

  • Anders Andersen
    Anders Andersen

    Yes, I'm one of those people who probably respond once or twice, but let things be as they are as soon as the conversation about the topic at hand is finished. As a matter of fact you and I exchanged some friendly messages about a year ago (I had to look that up though).

    It's not malice, it's my way of being. I don't feel a need to expand my circle of friends (mind you: I basically have none...just some left over JW semi-lost friends, and two old jw now exjw friends with whom I must push myself to rebuild the friendship), nor do I (claim to) have the time to.

    In fact, I strongly believe being raised as a JW is a root cause for this behaviour. Being raised as a JW you'll have insta-friends wherever you go. You'll never learn to properly start and maintain friendships.

    Others here simply move on; some members whom I had pm contact with here appear to be gone from this forum.

  • sparrowdown

    I freak out about getting to close with anyone on the internet or giving away too much personal info.

    It's not just an ex-jw thing either I just don't trust the internet.

  • stillin

    Typing really doesn't cut it for me. I've exchanged notes with some fine people here but whenever I "meet" somebody from this area, I get jittery and realize that I still have to keep my cover and so do they, for various reasons. In the meantime , I do enjoy the variety of people here and the banter. I may never have a close friend. So be it.

  • moreconfusedthanever

    Are we talking PM or threads? I answer PM when I get them. I have to have the last say so I will always answer a message if I get one. Hahahaha

  • zeb

    Pm mainly.

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