I'm new here. But I have been undercover for about 3 years. Recently I stopped going and faded(close to a year without stepping into the hall) . An old flame of mine (who is active witness) came back into the picture. She doesn't really know my status. Well we were texting and things took an "interesting" turn. She invited me over and let's just say some touching happened. Now I'm cool with it. She claims she is. But I hate the feeling of it being out of my control if the witness guilt hits her. So if I get the dreaded call from the elders (if they find me) what should I do or say? I like to be prepared for anything. Thanks in advance.
Advice help
by Undercoverbrother 14 Replies latest social relationships
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LisaRose
Deny, deny, deny. They have to have two witnesses, or they can't do anything to you even if she says you did something.
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Undercoverbrother
It's been a while since I been to the hall but I thought in cases like this they didn't need the two witness rule? Though they seem to apply such a rule when they deem it necessary. -
Divergent
They don't, IF you confess. If you don't, then they would need another person as a witness -
stephanie61092
You haven't been to the meetings in over a year. IF somehow they reach out, DONT take their call. A lot of people get in trouble because they're still actively attending the hall, and elders can't have someone commenting/giving talks/etc. if there's potential for a JC. IF they somehow get in touch with you, deny anything immoral happened. Don't deny you texted/saw her, because that could be easy to prove with text messages. But deny, deny, deny anything more than PG happened
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stephanie61092
You haven't been to the meetings in over a year. IF somehow they reach out, DONT take their call. A lot of people get in trouble because they're still actively attending the hall, and elders can't have someone commenting/giving talks/etc. if there's potential for a JC. IF they somehow get in touch with you, deny anything immoral happened. Don't deny you texted/saw her, because that could be easy to prove with text messages. But deny, deny, deny anything more than PG happened -
Undercoverbrother
This is good feedback. Thank you all -
sir82
If you don't confess and there are not 2 witnesses, they can't do a thing to you. -
stuckinarut2
If they contact you and ask intimate questions, simply MILDLY but firmly respond :
"Pardon, am I hearing you correctly? It seems as if you are asking some very inappropriate questions. Please respect the boundaries of common decency. Now, have a nice day"
By thus closing down the conversation and not engaging, it sends a clear message that boundaries need to be abided by.
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Anders Andersen
I'm with stuckinarut:
If some random stranger called you asking questions about whatever private and personal stuff they think of, you would firmly tell them to mind their own business.
Apply the same to nosy elders. They have ZERO authority, and have no justification to start asking questions about your personal relationships.
No need to lie, deny, or imply the other party is lying.
"None of your business what I do or do not do, so please be gone."
If they insist, you could return the favor by inquiring into their personal stuff....like "Have you ever engaged in oral sex? Anal sex? When was the last time you watched pornography?"