Can a Man Cheat on his Wife with Himself? AsK Prudence.....

by teenyuck 32 Replies latest jw friends

  • teenyuck
    teenyuck

    You want Fluff, I deliver.....

    This was in today's newspaper.....

    The writer is Ann Landers daughter. She has her own column called Dear Prudence.

    Dear Pru,My husband and I have been married for eight years and have a young family. He is a wonderful husband and father. We both have stressful jobs, but he is very active in helping to raise our two children (3 and 1). I am seven months pregnant, which doesn't leave "us" a lot of free time. So in the last year or so, our sexual relationship has been OK, but not what it once was.

    We are a religious family, which means we abstain from pornography and even R-rated movies. We also believe that "self-gratification" is a no-no. My husband has always had a fairly strong appetite (time permitting, two or three times a day wouldn't be too much for him). As you can imagine, three babies in four years has definitely taken a toll on my time and energy so that keeping up with him is not as easy as it once was. I thought I was still fairly active, but I think that my husband's thirst isn't being quenched. I have not exactly caught him red-handed, but I woke up one night to find him fondling himself. He's also spending a lot more time in the bathroom with the door locked. I'm trying to rationalize it, calling his needs natural, realizing that he has a stressful job and maybe it's a good tension reliever for him. The bottom line, though, is that I feel he is being hypocritical about the morals we believe in (i.e., we all need to control our appetites to make us better people). I also feel he is cheating on our marriage, just as if he was with another woman. I love him so much that I want his needs to be satisfied, but I want to be the one to satisfy them. What do I do?

    —Jealous Wife

    Dear Jel,
    If you want to be the one to satisfy him every time he, uh, has needs, just make yourself available two to three times a day, simply ignoring your pregnancy, your job, the two kids, and whatever else makes up your day. Self-gratification, you should know, is in no way cheating and is certainly not analogous to being with another woman. Your concerns are not all that unusual, but the wild card in your situation is the religious angle. Prudie does not wish to tangle with your pastor—or anyone else's—but regarding self-gratification as sinful is a benighted idea. It is an entirely normal thing to do. (And for whatever it's worth, no one's sex life is what it once was.)

    So, my question to you, fair reader, can a man cheat on his wife, with himself? And is the *happy* couple JW?

  • Vivamus
    Vivamus

    Fluff is sooo good, thanx Teenyuck

    OMG.

    They could definatly be a JW couple, masturbation is the evil sin after all.... And no way is a man cheating on his wife, if he masturbates a couple of times.... Come on.

    Uhm, actually, according to JW standards, maybe he would be cheating on his wife if he was masturbating?

    -

    And the world shall tremble in the wake of the Blue Bubblegum
    Dutch District Overbeer

  • StinkyPantz
    StinkyPantz

    OMG, this is so ridiculous !!

    I do not think that many JWs would consider masturbation cheating, even the extreme ones; but who knows?

  • teenyuck
    teenyuck

    I laughed out loud when I read this, in this morning...I tried to read it to my husband and gave up. He wasn't seeing the humor!

    The poor man....just wants a little nooky and all he gets is the wife beating on the bathroom door. Hopefully he has a long commute to work...

    She is actually jealous of his hand. Oiy!!!

  • Scully
    Scully

    y'know......

    in her "delicate condition" and all, she could be handling "his needs" herself.... and then she wouldn't be needing to wonder who he's thinking about while he's locked up with in his the johnson and spending way more time there than with her...

    But then again, the Scriptural counsel is:

    *** Rbi8 1 Thessalonians 4:3-4 ***

    3 For this is what God wills. . . 4 that each one of YOU should know how to get possession of his own vessel

    I guess they missed the Watchtower article on that.

    Love, Scully

  • Big Tex
    Big Tex

    So if she catches him in the act, does his right hand get DF'd?

  • Scully
    Scully

    Big Tex:

    Only if his left hand is willing to talk to the Judicial Committee.

    Love, Scully

  • Elsewhere
    Elsewhere

    Poor guy... stuck whacking off in the bathroom like a pubescent teenager.

  • teenyuck
    teenyuck
    Only if his left hand is willing to talk to the Judicial Committee.

    ROTFL!!!

  • Vivamus
    Vivamus
    Only if his left hand is willing to talk to the Judicial Committee.

    Love, Scully

    Mwahahaha, Classic!

    -

    And the world shall tremble in the wake of the Blue Bubblegum
    Dutch District Overbeer

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