Unbelievable! Is this even allowed? Two elders from my hall RANDOMLY stopped by my apartment!

by macys 27 Replies latest jw friends

  • Flg8ter
    Flg8ter
    They stopped by work yesterday to "see how I was doing." All I do is stay calm.....gracious.........thank them for coming, I appreciate their concern, we're good, I have their phone number, if I ever need anything I'll be sure to call them. The visits have been further and further apart. Important to remember to say as little as possible but don't be rude. Give them nothing and they have nothing to report to the other elders.
  • bafh
    bafh

    If you are trying to get reinstated, it might be good just to play nice. It's annoying, but there isn't anything to say they can't come by, they are elders, so they are probably checking up on you. You have to play along if you want to win the game.

  • MarkofCane
    MarkofCane
    Ya, Have to agree with the group, if you want to be reinstated then you must comply to there standards, once you are reinstated then you can avoid them and ask them to not show up uninvited. You can do it now but it will cast a questionable light on your sincerity of wanting to re join the flock. The memorial season is upon us and they are out in herds I see them everywhere, its kind of creepy that I was part of that frenzy and craziness. This is the crazies you are asking to return too so don't be shocked at there behavior just play there game, you just have to be smarter then them, trust me its not that hard.
  • macys
    macys
    I would love to tell them to f**k off! but I think you guys are forgetting that I am going through with my reinstatement. It is like walking on eggshells. I have to be careful, I have to look like I am concentrating at the meetings, I have to pretend to care. Of course this goes against the very fabric of who I am but I have no choice. I have to pretend. So please do not judge me. It is not that easy. I try to be strong for my family but it is so hard. I have nobody to understand what I am going through here. I cry almost everyday still. I go through phases when everything seems great and I do not care to be Df'd then other days I miss them so much. The more I think about it the more I hate this cult!
  • nelim
    nelim

    I'm wondering... are you afraid of the elders? I guess not really if you have woken up, but also yes in the sense that you want to be reinstated. Therefore be liked to some degree by them. Perhaps just view them as (random) other human beings. They call on you, but you don't have to let them in. Just thank them for their invitation to the memorial (remember it's one of their duties). Remember they have as much authority as you give them.

    None of the elders ever invited me to the memorial, should I feel happy or sad? I'm not sure :D

  • MarkofCane
    MarkofCane
    Its all just a fu@ked up game, the only real power they have is what you give them. I view them as misguided people, some times with good intentions, those I give some leeway. The one that are corporate men I don't tolerate in any shape or form. Be strong a lot of us are going through some very difficult stuff just in a different way we really do understand trust me we do. Be strong and know that you are not alone.
  • No Longer a JW Brother
    No Longer a JW Brother
    We got your back. I can look pretty intimidating. Peace.
  • Kick50r
    Kick50r

    I don't really understand .You want to go back to the Corporation and seem surprised that they visit you?

    You are going through a reinstatement process aka YOU wanted them to visit.

    BTW the "theocratic warfare" method you just described ( avoiding conversations) is something you will NOT be able to do daily, once you're reinstated.

    You will have to actually get your act together and either just lie in theyre faces daily when subject to EXTREME personal questions or leave. I've read your bio and I think you know there will be a LOT of questions down the road.

    I know , and most of us know unfortunately what it is to live "undercover" , to lose affection from the pppl we love , but are you sure lying to yourself the rest of your life is the right choice?

    If so, prepare yourself cz a LOT MORE is coming down the road,as you should know if you been around the org before.

    Take Care and all the best

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