Moving On.

by Englishman 20 Replies latest jw friends

  • Englishman
    Englishman

    First we were all Jehovah's witnesses. That was the most important thing in our lives, our raison d'etre. It was how we identified ourselves. Most of us felt a compulsion to make others aware that we were witnesses. Then, usually after a period of disillusionment, we became ex-Jehovah's witnesses, and that then became our raison d'etre. Now we had to tell everyone just how awful it is being a Jehovah's witness.

    In a way, we actually become witnesses in reverse, we actively discuss "This bad news of the dubdom" as avidly as we once did when promoting JW beliefs. We post eagerly on sites such as this and contact with other ex's becomes more of a delight than any dub assembly could ever be.

    Eventually, though, for most of us anyway, this phase also begings to fade. In time many of us don't even want to think about our lives when we were in the JW religion, we just want to leave it behind us. A few are able to use their experience to help other departee's pretty well on an ongoing basis. Forunately, rare pro-active persons such as Alan F, Randy and Norm seem to have developed the ability to lead a productive life away from JW's and are yet still able to occasionally wear their dub hat to help newbie ex's.

    So the fact that most of the less pro-active posters eventually cease to post here shouldn't, IMHO, be a cause for sorrow, even if we do miss them.

    Really, when a person posts here, often prodigiously, and then just disappears, it's a sign that that person has actually realised his goal and become totally reintegrated into normal society.

    Which means that this site has helped with an excellent job of work!

    Englishman.

  • Goshawk
    Goshawk

    Well said and spot on Englishman. Goshawk

  • xjw_b12
    xjw_b12

    Englishman

    Really, when a person posts here, often prodigiously, and then just disappears, it's a sign that that person has actually realised his goal and become totally reintegrated into normal society.

    So what does it mean for us who are still here ?

    xjw_b12 of the "abnormal" class

  • Englishman
    Englishman
    So what does it mean for us who are still here ?

    Well, many of us can change hats and not be bothered by it, others need to drop the whole shebang.

    Englishman.

  • Scully
    Scully

    xjw_b12 writes:

    So what does it mean for us who are still here ?

    It means that we're the ones who are here for those who are just leaving the JWs or who have doubts. We're the ones who let those people know that it's OK to be angry, depressed, afraid, etc about leaving the JWs, and that there are people who come through the experience stronger, wiser, and sure of themselves. We also show them that there is a life to be lived and happiness to be had outside the JWs.

    Don't ever underestimate the value our surviving and thriving as a result of this journey has to other people.

    Love, Scully

  • waiting
    waiting

    The best revenge is to live a happy life. - author unknown at the moment

    Scully's right. When I left the jw's - my sil (who knew the situation, but didn't understand jw's) said "Well, I guess you'll just have to find another church." I was dumbfounded. There IS no other church! There IS no other religion.

    lol - and then I found the internet & learned there were thousands of jw's & xjw's doing well, ok, poorly, whatever. But they survived without the WTBTS.

    The Internet is a gift of freedom to xjw's. And a curse to the compulsive/obsessive amongst us (including me for the humor impaired amongst us too)

    waiting

  • sandy
    sandy
    So what does it mean for us who are still here ?

    It means GET A LIFE! lol, just kidding.

  • RAYZORBLADE
    RAYZORBLADE

    For some, just seeing this site and all its contents: is enough for some.

    Then there are those who remain for awhile, take what they need, and move on.

    Then there are those of us who want to be around for the constant exodus of JWs. Being able to offer them information that can help them examine their faith, unquestioned and without negative ramifications.

    We also offer a warm welcome.

    We offer an opportunity for former JWs to regain or initiate 'Free Thinking'. Getting their own minds back again, being able to think for oneself, without the WTBTS blinders on.

    I think this is normal with most websites/forums. People come and people go: there are the ones who remain always.

  • rocketman
    rocketman

    Indeed, for many, they are not fully 'healed' as it were until they move on. I can understand why, in time, they don't want to be reminded of their jw past. When one posts/lurks here, it brings up a range of feelings, and many just don't want to deal with those emotions any longer. God bless them as they move on.

  • Simon
    Simon

    I think it's good that so many have stopped by for a while and then felt that they can move on.

    I like people being here and using the site but in a way it would not be so rewarding if everyone who ever signed up was still here posting. What would it have achieved?

    The get-togethers and apostafests are good. The first few times we've met with people we naturally talked about JW issues but since we've met up with the same people more often it's quite rare that the WTS is discussed other than being the butt of the odd joke or jibe.

    If it were not for us running the forum then we would probably have moved on ourselves by now. We appreciate all the friends we've made and enjoy running the site but for me personally, I find the WTS more of an acedemic interest now.

    Don't get me wrong, it still affects me and impacts my family, some of whom I have little contact with, but to be honest ... I don't care that much - they know where I am if they ever get their brains back. I have better things to do with my life and my own family comes first.

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