Are you sad or angry?

by raven 27 Replies latest jw experiences

  • somebody

    This whole thread makes me sad. I'm happy that others can share their pain here, but this is why it makes me SO MAD when JWs say things such as " anyone is FREE to leave the organization" AND the site claims that JWs " DO NOT SHUN those who leave the organization". It is ALL lies! People who just choose to leave and state that they choose to leave ARE SHUNNED AND TREATED AS IF THEY ARE UNREPENTANT SINNERS. THEY ARE TREATED THE SAME AS IF THEY ARE A DISFELLOWSHIPED JW !

    My heart goes out to Raven and all of you who have been tossed out of your families and your loved ones. For real.

  • scratchme1010

    Since I was born in that organization and since my family members were not too supportive, and since I am gay, and since I have always love learning and studying, I was too busy enjoying my new found freedom from all the JW --it I grew up with, that it was over a decade later when I was able to have time and space in my life to reflect about the time wasted and the undeserved mistreatment I was submitted to.

    However, yes, anger is a natural, normal thing to feel after realizing about their negative effects and how they want to influence your most important life decisions. It is just angering to have so many people following them, families divided, people dying.

  • ctrwtf

    My two cents....anger is a more productive emotion. Because you are also correct in your beliefs and conclusions regarding the cult, Righteous anger is even better. Let it guide you to write off the emotional baggage that comes with leaving the cult and move on to people and things that you have no need to be angry with or sad about.

  • cyberjesus

    I am happy that I'm out. I am thankful to be alive and awake.

    It's a choice.

    You can feel whatever you want to feel.

  • OneGenTwoGroups

    I feel a spectrum of emotions. Sometimes I feel sorry for all of my friends a deep sense of pity. Sometimes, while I'm driving around the metro area, I pause a podcast and rant like a madman about something that is bothering me.

    It will get better for me soon. I just need to be patient. A recent major event has put me a lot closer to ending my fade.

  • flipper

    RAVEN- Good thread ! Thanks for posting it . It is a drag to be shunned by our JW families to be sure- but after experiencing being shunned by my family for so long now- for me it's kind of a relief not to be around the crazy cult mentality they all have. I much prefer to hang out with my inactive or non-JW adult nieces, nephews and my son who is out of the cult.

    It's normal to feel anger at how unjustly we've been treated or sadness about being lied to as well. The longer I have been out I've turned that anger over to more progressive actions like telling people how criminal and insane the JW organization is. I talk to non-JW's and try to be proactive in exposing WT child abuse by leaving news printouts at grocery store community billboards and by doing this it helps me release some of my pent up anger in a way that might assist others to avoid joining the WT organization. I've even wrote songs about WT injustices and that helps me get the " lead " out of my system - so to speak- a release.

    I think you will find that in time a few years down the road you will be much more involved with your new activities in life and with time it might lessen the pain we receive from our JW relatives- it still hurts but we understand it more once we read information about mind control and see that it's NOT us it's THEM. They are the ones mentally ill . Just know that we are here for you as friends as a support for you. Hang in there, it gets better in time. You are newly exited from the cult so be easy on yourself and kind to yourself- taking care of yourself allowing yourself to feel any emotions you need to feel in order to heal. You aren't alone- we feel you. Take care, Peace out, Mr. Flipper

  • Chook

    I'm lucky Raven ,none of my blood relatives are in, but wife is still cult affected ( inactive but believes) l don't know whether anyone can ever free their mind of all poison. My heart bleeds for the damage for those born in. Be true to yourself, I'm so fortunate that I have each crazy friend on this forum to vent with . Any lost sheep is welcome in my heart

  • Freeandclear

    At first I was pretty upset. Mostly because I no longer had all the answers to life's big questions. Then I got angry at all the wasted time. I have no family in the bOrg so my situation is different than some/most. Now I'm fine. I have made peace with the fact that I will die and that NOTHING solves everything, ie. the Paradise fallacy. I will live the rest of my days, however short or long, and I will die. At that point either I will find out there is more, or I will be truly dead and not know anything. Whatever the reality turns out to be I'm fine with that. It all changes as time goes on and you realize these essential truths.

  • LisaRose

    At first I was just relieved to be free of the whole thing, the fear, obligation and guilt. Then, I was sad at how much of my life had been wasted. Then, when I found it how much of everything I believed had been based on lies, I was angry. Eventually I realized anger was a useless emotion and would hold me back from living a great life, and I am not going to let the Watchtower hurt me twice, so I got over it. My life has turned out pretty well, the Watchtower is very much in my rear view mirror at this point.

  • zeb

    Raven and others. please keep in mind this. That when relatives say they will shun you quoting endless wt spiel reply to them that you will honour that by shunning them.

    Once you have left the wt and your disposable income has improved keep their shunning in mind when they come crawling for $$$ to help put an aged parent into care or pay bills that their CHOICE to pioneer has left them impoverished. Its called tough love and they will never change a gram for you but will take all you give and still treat you like a leper.

    and as another has said here my heart goes out to you and all you have gone through. My own mother (dcd) had not a good word to say about the jw until she converted then it was 'warp 9' ahead with no consideration to the hurt she caused. again Raven my heart to you...

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