What Do You Know of JWs Getting Away With Stuff?

by minimus 15 Replies latest jw friends

  • skin

    The same was going in the congregation I first attended when I joined WT in my early 20s, was told through my Bible study that witnesses don't have sex before marriage, drunkenness is forbidden. Then I started getting to know and hanging around with the young JW crowd, first thing I remember saying to myself after spending my first weekends with them as a new JW, was that these people aren't any different, they are all heavily drinking and swearing. I was surprised 😮. Then as time went by, and getting to know the young ones better, I started hearing about who had done what to who sexually, even out country witnessing, I even walked in on my first witness girlfriend at it with a single brother who had only moved into our congregation a week earlier. I know a lot more that never got reported, then there were those who did get their names mentioned (reproved) at the meetings. Thinking back, there was a high percentage doing these things.

    I did type up more real life experiences in this post, but after reading them, I decided to delete them, it sounded like it could be made up, even though it wasn't.

  • StephaneLaliberte

    I think this really changes from congregation to congregation. I have seen kids "get away" with fornication as they denied everything and were protected by the two witness rule. As to know if the parents were behind this... I don't know.

    What I can share though is that there was an elder in one of my congregation that was reproved and lost his privileges. Turns out he had been aware of bad things his son was doing and didn't turn him in. The other elders, who also had kids, didn't let that slide and everyone knew about it. About that elder: he was loved by everyone and even after he lost his privileges, he was still loved by everyone. It seems like the general feeling at the time was that no one actually judged him for it, but "the law is the law" and he was removed. I believe that he got back to be an elder roughly a decade later.

    Point is, it depends on the congregations.

  • StephaneLaliberte

    In my early 20s, "I was straight as an arrow". I once attended a party organized by JWs in Montreal and it was similar to a rave where there was loud techno music and people were dancing real close. I was the one driving my friends, so I ended up going to my car and waited for everyone there. I prepared my meetings, read WT magazines and books that were in my car. Never told on anyone.

    At the time, I felt super spiritual and judged others, but looking back, I realize I was the one who lacked control. A lot of these kids were happy to simply flirt and dance and stop there. In my case, I would have wanted more, so I had to step out of there entirely. Like an alcoholic that doesn't even take a slip of alcohol.

    Now that I'm raising my kids, I realize that all the consequences that comes along with "sinning" are enough: dramas (crazy girlfriends, heartaches, crazy Ex's, gossip, etc), STDs and pregnancies. No need for the congregations to add more. Religions should instead help these kids navigate through this difficult time rather than making their lives even more difficult than it already is.

  • minimus

    Once those disobedient kids grew up and went their own way, the ex elder was welcomed back. What a joke!!

  • exjwlemming

    When I was a JW and running with the JW teenagers in high school, I had a friend that would sneak out to the car at lunch and get hammered. He would keep a hidden flask in school and knew where he could get served without any issues. He regularly got into fights and beat the crap out of several kids. He was all over the "worldly" girls yet his parents wouldn't let him do after school activities or sports because of bad associations. He had many girlfriends in high school. Elder's kids having sex, partying, drinking, light drug use, drag racing, and stealing were common after "JW time." Ironically, they would be used as a fine christian example in meeting and assembly parts. We thought it was funny because he was the worst of the worst. Only 1 out of about a dozen are still a JW.

  • minimus


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