Bay Area Dubs

truthseeker1

I just talked to my ex about her weekend and she said something that really disturbed me. She spent the weekend up in the Bay Area (SF area of CA) with a bunch of dubs. She was telling me about them and made the comment of them being different from the stuffy here in Fresno. She said they were all laid back, and looked and dressed and acted like regular people. She said for field service meeting they just kicked it for about an hour talking and joking. Many are in rock bands, ay role playing games and are educated. She said it was totally different than the dubs here in town.

A couple things come to mind...

A) These dubs are on their way out. It sounds like to me that they wouldn't act like this if the CO is there. I doubt these people are looked highly upon by the elders in the cong.

B) She is totally exagerating their attitude to make me feel like i have no valid reasons to leave. A message like "See, not all people are like the people here" Which make me laugh because the people here in fresno are just doing what the borg tells them to do. According to the dubs, all of them should behave like this.

So, is anyone here familiar with the dubs up in the bay area (Monteray, San Jose, San Fransisco, etc?) and if this is true or just a little propaganda to make me feel bad or something...

Thanks!

freedom96

Hi-

I grew up in the Bay Area; spent 17 years going to meetings and such. Not all that area is fun and games.

I was in the San Jose area, and the hall that I went to, was about as strict as you could get. No provisions for kids getting together, at weddings dancing was just about banned. You mess up, you were gone.

Our P.O. was feared all around the Bay Area. Not a fun place.

Now, a few miles away, were some halls that were much more relaxed, who were genuine, who cared, and were much more tolerable.

I feel that congregation attitudes can change within 10 miles of each other. Doesn't matter the location.

SloBoy

Truthseeker1,

Interesting post........Whether true or false, the reality for me is pretty much the same. If true, it just shows how the WBTS's claim to "united in conduct" by the worldwide brotherhood is bogus. And if false, it begs the question, " Why do some dubs use the old ' Were just like everyone else ' to attract those (such as yourself ) who have been told that Witnesses are different/better than society in general?" Either way, for a person such as myself, needing sufficient doses of honesty to nuture what spirituality I do have, I need to put a great deal of distance between me and any organization so rife with contradictions.

SloBoy

that's SloBoy from Northern California

Valis

um Sloboy...could you send me a care package of spiritual food from Northern Cali? Its been way too long since I tasted the kindness of Humboldt County...*pines for the Sierra Nevadas*..

Sincerely,

District Overbeer of the "Wish I was In Eureka" class

truthseeker1

Thanks for the replies. I think they act like that because they are a younger generation. They still are brain washed, but hate being different from the world. I'm pretty sure most kids are like this in the borg, but was wondering if the NorCal dubs had a more relaxed enviornment. Back when I was in, I heard the East coast were more fundie than the west coast. They wern't allowed to go to watch any disney movies or anything like that. Maybe it goes back to the rooted differences between east coast/west coast in America. (Jazz, Rap and now JWism). LOL

sandy

Truthseeker1 - My guess would be that your sister is exaggerating. She probably did notice a more relaxed congregation than others but it probably wasn't as free as she tried to make you believe.

Sloboy made some very good points. JW are always trying to get people in by saying things that contradict themselves.

I have a perfect example: (I am sure I posted this a million times on other topics)

When my sister talks to me about going back to meetings she always tells me: "Come back to meetings you can find a good brother in the org. You can't trust any worldly guys they are all the same. All they'll do is lie and cheat on you"

Then in the very next sentence she says "look at so-n-so she broke up with her worldly boyfriend for Jehovah. And he was so nice he seemed like a really good guy, too bad he didn't want the truth.

They totally contradict themselves all the time! Which is it? Is he a nice guy or a jerk just like all non-JW men?

amac

She may have not been exagerrating. All along the West Coast SF/Oakland/Berkeley, LA, San Diego, you will find a lot of 'liberal" JWs.

Introspection

Well I'm in the bay area (Marin county, north of SF) and I gotta tell ya that just didn't make any difference to me.

The thing is, I really bought the whole JW belief system, I thought it was true and it was important to me - I wasn't in it to make friends. The thing is though, it got to a point where I felt I had no support spiritually speaking, and I just couldn't do it anymore. Of course, that was a blessing because later I find out all the reasons there is for leaving, so even though I didn't know much about it at the time it was good I left.

Here's the point.. It's sort of like the difference between having friends at work and the job and the company you work for. Your friends might be nice and cool people, you might enjoy each others company outside of work - some of them may think they work for a good company - but if you know that it's not the case, say they are a front for a drug cartel or whatever - then you probably wouldn't want to stay!

What I would find disturbing IS the fact that they are so relaxed and liberal, because that indicates to me that they got things so well compartmentalized in their mind that they wouldn't care if they stay in an organization that teaches falsehood because they're comfortable with it. I wouldn't want to be with people like that. In fact, it's better to have strict anal witnesses in a way, because atleast those people know where they stand. This kind of liberal attitude could almost be like "Yeah, deep down we don't really believe it - but we won't talk to each other about that because we're all witnesses, lets just go through the motions so we can still have friends and a social support structure." It's this "I don't really care" attitude. (this is not to say liberal witnesses are necessarily aware of how things actually are - it may just be that they haven't bothered to take a close look) I mean, sure it's great that someone doesn't get too caught up with it - it may even allow them to fade eventually. But the thing is they probably don't care about how other people are hurt either, and that's worse than a person in denial. Someone in denial won't allow themselves to face the truth because of the implications, they would have to do a 180 and change their view of the witnesses and seriously reconsider being one at the very least, and with someone that committed if they consider the facts then it's almost guaranteed they would turn around. With someone who doesn't care, they just wouldn't care. Frankly, I think that is more dangerous and at the risk of sounding harsh, if they don't care then they almost deserve what they get.

truthseeker1

Wow, great points Intro.

Sandy, it was my ex-wife who btw, is not my sister (YUCK) said this to me.

It gets me upset when I hear of people like this. She talked about how great and nice these people are. She said how much they are not like the dubs we are used to. (not a direct quote). She is right, these people are more hypocritical. We all know how they are supposed to behave if they are dubs. We all know the rules that they have to follow. Hell, we all used to get talked to about having too much fun in service. Its supposed to be serious work, not play time.

Well, thanks for the confirmation on my thoughts. Maybe I'll bring it up to her next time I talk to her.

Bay Area Dubs

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