My Memorial Experience

by sandy 13 Replies latest jw friends

  • sandy

    Mattnoel - I have no problem with declining their invitation to attend the special talk or assemblies. I know it shouldn't be but the memorial is different even to me still. I still have that little voice in my head saying I should go to this one, most, important night of the year.

    It's kind of like how people attend church on Christmas or Easter Sunday. I know it is hypocritical but I did it anyways.

    If I didn't live at home I am 95% sure I wouldn't have gone. I would have just lied to my family and said I did but I would have felt a little guilty for not attending.

  • sandy

    When I left there was a black guy walking in so I said to him to hurry he was going to miss the bread and wine but to remember not to eat any of it. lol

    Heathen, I have a question for you and I am not trying to imply you are a racist.

    In your comment above you mentioned the guy was black. Why? I do not see any point in mentioning that. I often wonder why people (I am guilty of it myself) include a person's race when telling a story when it has nothing to do with the point of the story.

    Please do not take any offense.


  • bluesapphire

    Sandy, I do it all the time too -- mention the race. Like if someone cuts me off and she happened to be oriental I would say, "Some oriental lady cut me off...." It's not racist because I don't feel my race is superior to hers. But it is stereotyping.

    Or if there is a fight at my kids school they might say, "Some Mexicans got into a fight...." Or some Blacks, etc.

    Or sometimes, "Some White Trailer Trash bla bla bla...."

    Why do we do it? I don't have a clue. Is it conditioning? Possibly. Or maybe some groups of people have certain characteristics that stand out more -- or we imagine they do. It's a good question. You should start a thread on it.

    Re the Memorial: I think the fading thing works best when you have family in that you care about. You're never completely free if you fade, but it's the lesser of the two evils. You used theocratic strategy. We learned that well, didn't we? Good for you. I mark you a G for Good.

    As for me, I have a plan how to get my sister back. I'm thinking of pretending I am going back. It could back-fire but I know she wants to be able to talk to me again. Then I'll do the slow fade. I've never formally disassociated or been df'd so I don't have to kiss ass. Just go back to a few meetings for a while. Am I being a hypocrite! You betcha! Sometimes we have to be thanks to the FDS who taught us well!

  • heathen

    Just thought I'd thro a little detail in on the events .There were lots of blacks whites mexicans and god knows what . The place was pretty packed .I couldn't for the life of me understand why someone would even think racist by me adding someones ethnicity .I have never oppressed anyone simply because of color or any other reason but often find people accusing me of this nonsense .

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