For those who became JWs as adults...

by Sara Annie 8 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • Sara Annie
    Sara Annie

    Before I begin, it would probably be helpful for me to (in a nutshell) explain that I am not currently, nor have I ever been, one of Jehovah's Witnesses. My experience with the organization is peripheral in that my extended family became heavily involved several years ago. In maintaining a relationship with that part of the family, I had relatively extensive dealings with the JWs (for a "worldly" person) for many years of my childhood and beyond (If you're at all interested, you can read the details of my experience here: http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/7/44589/626056/post.ashx#626056). I have recently begun working on a post-graduate degree in philosophy (with a planned emphasis in comparative religious studies) and the months I have spent here reading and participating in discussions here have been both enjoyable and interesting.

    My continued investigation into the Witnesses and their activities has been enlightening. I fully accept that the WT is a cultist organization (given my research into the basic characteristics of cults), I see the emotional dependence that the WT fosters in its constituency, and I absolutely understand how the threat of losing one's entire family and social circle motivates people to remain within the organization (or fade away in order to maintain their reputation in the community). But the more I know, the less I understand something: If you were not either born into the religion, or exposed as a minor by parents who converted in adulthood, how is it that you came to believe that the information being presented to you was "The Truth™"?

    As a relatively intelligent human being with at least average powers of discernment, it puzzles me how any rational adult would read the material disseminated by the Witnesses and be so convinced of its veracity as to leave their former beliefs and lives behind to subscribe to it. It seems to me that to buy into what the WT "bible study" literature and process advocate, it would take a great deal of blind trust in the information you'd been given, and it seems that blind trust is tantamount to naiveté. I think that most human beings have a healthy amount of natural skepticism. It's against my nature, and most people's I would think, to give credence to anything of importance without at least a modicum of research on the subject. Common sense cautions us to "beware of the man who has read only one book", and at least a cursory glance at other information available is generally advisable before boldly subscribing to a new belief.

    I also have come to believe that the emotional state of the potential convert must be extremely important in whether or not they are susceptible to the sales pitch. I think that was the case with my family (again, see: http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/7/44589/626056/post.ashx#626056) and I am interested to know if emotional state played a big part in the acceptance of JW beliefs in other adults.

    I'm sure this subject has been covered multiple times by other threads and posters (but without that darn "search" function, it's difficult to pare down) but my sincere question is this: If you converted to the religion in adulthood, what were the factors that led you to believe that the WT was indeed presenting you with the one 'true' religion? Did you do any research into the organization before/while you were studying? Do you feel that your emotional state at the time of your exposure to the Witnesses was a factor in your decision to join the organization? If you had the opportunity to change the circumstances surrounding your introduction to the WT, what would you do differently (besides just not answer the door!) that you think would have had an effect on whether or not you would have become involved in with the JWs?

    I know this is a tall order, and I appreciate any sincere responses. If you've answered these questions before, a link to your post would be great. I would love to be able to use information gathered on this forum as citable testimonial research, and would of course protect anonymity as well as request permission before using any person's posted experiences in any work-product.

    On a more personal note, I want to again extend my congratulations and admiration to everyone here who, no matter their current standing in the organization, has had the courage to investigate the religion beyond the boundaries the WT allows. Truth will always stand up to scrutiny. I thank you for your time in reading (and responding) to my questions, and apologize for the length of this post!

  • LB
    LB
    emotional state of the potential convert must be extremely important

    You bet it must. When I became a witness there were several factors. I was nearing 50 years of age. I weighed about 337 pounds and was depressed and miserable. I also had just moved to Oregon and didn't know anyone. One of the first people I met was a witness. Shortly afterwards our creek washed out our road, a large group of witnesses showed up and repaired my road so we weren't stranded at no cost. They all seemed to be very nice, friendly, loving, ect ect ect.

    Did I closely examine the teachings? Not really, certainly not with any literature outside of watchtower publishings. As far as I was concerned I did not have a clue as to what was really involved with being a witness. I went to meetings, got baptized and then things began to change. Suddenly people weren't as nice since I was no longer a "study". It was an eye opener.

    You might think about clicking on my name here to see my DA letter which explains a bit more.

    But the basics of being a witness sounded as good to me as anything else. Live forever on earth as opposed to living forever in heaven? One idea made as much sense as another.

    At least being a witness got me to actually read the bible whereas I no longer trust it or have an ounce of faith in it now.

  • Sara Annie
    Sara Annie

    LB-

    Thanks for your response, and for pointing me toward your DA letter.

    I think that emotional state (and the "love-bombing" they showed her at the beginning) played a giant role in my Aunt (and subsequently her whole family's) involvement with the witnesses. From many of the posts I've read it seems like the real nuts and bolts of witness life are withheld until after baptism.

    As a side note, I enjoy reading your posts on a variety of topics. I like the "tell it as you see it" attitude. Thanks again for responding!

    Sara

  • DanTheMan
    DanTheMan

    : If you converted to the religion in adulthood, what were the factors that led you to believe that the WT was indeed presenting you with the one 'true' religion?

    I found the "Creation" book to be very convincing. I never looked into the other side of the argument.
    Did you do any research into the organization before/while you were studying?

    Nope. The love-bombing I experienced at the KH made me want to believe it was true. I never looked into opposing arguments.
    Do you feel that your emotional state at the time of your exposure to the Witnesses was a factor in your decision to join the organization?
    Well, yes of course. Very lonely and confused individual I was.
    If you had the opportunity to change the circumstances surrounding your introduction to the WT, what would you do differently (besides just not answer the door!) that you think would have had an effect on whether or not you would have become involved in with the JWs?

    I would have paid more attention to the red flags I had going up telling me "Slow down" and "proceed with caution" and "are you sure about this". But the sense that I was joining an elite group of people who had special, insider knowledge was too intoxicating.

  • happysunshine
    happysunshine

    I've often had the same questions about my parents. They joined when they were 17/23 yoa, in the 1950s. I know there were some abuse/abandonment issues in their families. They often spoke of the sense of a replacement family, and having a purpose. My aunt described this as "love for the unloved". I remember my dad saying that if someone had taken an academic/career guidiance interest in him as a young person, things might have been different. Its just my opinion, but the necessary 'prevention' would seem to have to be more holistic in nature- family,community, guidance, etc. -J

  • Silverleaf
    Silverleaf

    Hi Sarah Annie,

    I was never a JW but was involved with a young man [my former fiance] who converted as an adult. The emotional issue is extremely important, I think. My ex had been a rather neglected child and had a chaotic family history. When he met the Witnesses they became a surrogate family to him which was something he desperately needed. He was lost emotionally and they happily told him what to do and how to do it; he responded to that because no one had ever taken much of an interest in his life before that.

    What amazed me was in meeting his Witness friends [who were interested in me for about five seconds - once I started asking hard questions they didn't want anything to do with me or want him to either] I found him introducing me to people from abusive homes, abusive marriages, people with former [and current] alcohol problems and severe emotional turmoil. I began to see that the "Truth" seemed like a haven for people who had terrible experiences in life and needed someplace to be where they felt safe. The problem was many of these people probably needed counseling [like my fiance] but they weren't going to get it because now the Watchtower was going to fix all their problems for them.

    I saw that the promise of everlasting life and perfection played a big role also. Here was someone who had always felt inadequate and the prospect of someday being 'perfect' was extremely appealing to him. He believed that in paradise all the bad experiences of his life would be wiped from his mind and he would finally be able to be happy. That's a big draw for someone whose life has been miserable.

    I hope you find this helpful, even though it's not my personal experience as a JW,

    Silverleaf

  • berylblue
    berylblue

    I was a former Catholic who had walked out in disgust of that Church years earlier when a witness knocked on my door.

    I was lonely, poor, depressed and being emotionally abused by my husband.

    I believed most, if not all, of the original information presented to me from the Bible. It made perfect sense. Spend 17 years trying to reason on ludicrous Catholic theology, and the simplicity of the "good news" will seem miraculous. The message of the Witnesses appealled to my need for simple, concise logic.

    The thing that got me totally involved was that I did pray to Jehovah, asking him to show me what his will for me was. These prayers (ostensibly) helped me to do things I never thought I would be able to do.

    From the start, however, I did not see any outpouring of love and acceptance. So I decided to be the "loving" one in the congregation. That filled my need to help others, as well as my need to feel "special". Hey! I was on the "narrow road". Even as a young girl, I used to worry about that. I knew, as a Catholic, that I was not on the narrow road. I was sure I had found it. Hey! Someone (Jehovah) finally loved me. And there -was- love in the congregation. I was supplying it - in my limited, neurotic way, of course.

    I did not believe many of the "deeper" philosophers (the "meat"). But I kept my mouth shut. Things became less and less logical. Downright stupid, in some cases.

    No, I did not see at all how the WTS was a cult. It never occured to me. I was grateful to know get to know a loving God. Funny how he became much less loving as time went on. His love became conditional. In the end, listening to the Witnesses, it seemed he was no better than the Catholic god; he'd nuke me at Armegeddon for sure.

    The fault is not with Jehovah. It's with "his" organization. Imperfect men, yeah, blah, blah, blah. How much less perfect can they get?

    Beryl

  • Sara Annie
    Sara Annie
    I found him introducing me to people from abusive homes, abusive marriages, people with former [and current] alcohol problems and severe emotional turmoil. I began to see that the "Truth" seemed like a haven for people who had terrible experiences in life and needed someplace to be where they felt safe. The problem was many of these people probably needed counseling [like my fiance] but they weren't going to get it because now the Watchtower was going to fix all their problems for them.

    Silverleaf- that was exactly my experience with the witnesses as a child! I couldn't believe how they used to sit around talking about how special and wonderful their religion and 'brotherhood' was, and in the next breath discuss the numerous drugs that were being taken for various psychological problems. As an adult, I have felt that if I had a dime for each time a JW has enumerated upon the many mental illnesses prevalent in their congregation I could buy a small country. What amazes me more, is that while they're blathering on about sister so-and-so's sexual abuse issues, or their mother's obsessive-compulsive disorder, or their brother-in-law's anger issues, they don't stop to think that the prevalence of so many mental health issues in a specific community is pretty damn weird. Amazing.

    Spend 17 years trying to reason on ludicrous Catholic theology, and the simplicity of the "good news" will seem miraculous.

    Beryl-As someone who grew up Catholic, this makes a great deal of sense to me. It was the same with my family members, I believe. There had been some type of scandal in their parish, and the knock on the door was welcomed with open arms.

    I would have paid more attention to the red flags I had going up telling me "Slow down" and "proceed with caution" and "are you sure about this".

    DantheMan-

    Isn't that the truth? I think that's something that we all need to work on. That little voice inside of us is there for a reason, and I know I don't always listen to it like I should. (Of course, if the little voice inside of you has a name, a distinct personality, and a thirst for blood it's an entirely different matter!)

    They often spoke of the sense of a replacement family, and having a purpose. My aunt described this as "love for the unloved". I remember my dad saying that if someone had taken an academic/career guidiance interest in him as a young person, things might have been different.

    happysunshine-

    This sums up the impression I get from just about everyone. I can see how someone who saw themselves as 'damaged' would be attracted to the "love" they found in the organization...

    Thank you again, everyone, for your replies so far. This has been a journey of understanding for me, and I am so thankful that you've taken the time to relay your experiences.

  • OICU8it2
    OICU8it2

    My first wife became interested while we were engaged. I think, primarily for their teaching on the ressurection. She had lost an infant and was devastated for a couple years. My impression came from their explanation of why God permits wickedness. Their numerology was impressive to me. We were both in our early twenties.

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit