you have brought a smile to my face more times than i can count. i even laugh out loud at some of your responses to people. and i know i'm not alone. you are a true asset to this forum. i'd hug you if i could.
we grew up in a bizarro world where we were taught to feel guilty for any human thought or emotion we had. it's only natural that some of that mindset hangs on even when we remove ourselves from that situation. i've been out for five years, and i'm just starting to feel like i'm truly a good, worthwile person. it's tragic that we even have to have this conversation. we should all feel good about ourselves; it shouldn't be that we have to literally teach ourselves that we are worthwile people.
i hope you can find some comfort in these responses. we are all here for you, supporting you and hoping that you come out of this slump. i am familiar with slumps myself. it seems that the way we were raised automatically puts us at a disadvantage. growing up with the weight of the world on our little shoulders is a heavy burden to bear. the guilt is instilled from the get-go.
i'm glad you feel free enough to share with us. it really does help to talk about it. like i said, we are all here for you. take care, joelbear.