Disassociating inactive ones? (page 2)

rebel

I was called on the other night by 2 elders and an MS. Apparently, according to others on this forum, they are probably trying to find a way of either making me be the good, dutiful, submissive, wifey-sister that I never was or they want to boot me out completely. Well, I have an opinion of my own, I have my own mind. God gave me a brain and a mouth and I often use them both - much to the disgust of many elders. When I see young ones being picked on unfairly, elders wives spreading gossip, a member of my own family treated like garbage because a particular elder took a dislike to her, an elder's son getting away with murder (anyone else would have been disfellowshipped for what he has done in the past), malicious lies told about certain ones because their face doesn't fit, emotional blackmail used to make everyone toe the line - well that's when I use my mouth BIG TIME - and it gets me into trouble every time. But I will continue to speak out when I feel an injustice has been done because these people think they are above everyone else. They can say and do as they please and we just have to agree with it or keep quiet. But I would rather put up with the pain that will inevitably come with my being DFd or DAd, than put up with this hell-hole of a religion. I feel sick and panicky when I go to the meetings, I feel sick and panicky when I don't. This situation is so ridiculous, it has to stop.

For all you out there going through the same thing - just stick with it and do what you believe is right.

xxR

ISP

Disassociating inactive ones?

This is always on the cards. It will depend on the dynamics of the local elders. They may want your ass if so you can expect trouble. There are usually examples, mind you, in the elders own families where someone is not attending like a son/daughter but does not get any judicial attention. Sp watch for the double standard.

In my old hall, one of the elders daughter's who is baptised is living with a lad....she does not attend and nothing has happened to her!

ISP

Scully

It appears this is what happened with us. We were visited by a pair of elders about 3 weeks ago now, they met with hubby while he was fixing our ~~Christmas~~ ~~pagan~~ ~~winter solstice~~ seasonal lighting on the front of the house.

When it was clear to the elders that hubby was not interested in going back to meetings and becoming an active JW again (which is the stated mandate of these visits, according the letter to all congregations of Nov 7, 2002), one of the elders asked him "Do you consider yourself to be a JW?" to which he replied "No".

Now it gets interesting - the same elder asked hubby "Does your wife consider herself to be a JW?" and he said "I don't think so, but I'm not sure about it." They never spoke to me directly, never asked me to take a stand one way or the other, they have never received a letter from me because I have not written one, yet I heard that an announcement was made that I am DAd. (Reliable source, 200 km away.)

So a person can NOT become a JW on someone else's say-so - the individual has to do all the studying, qualifying for field service "privileges", qualifying for baptism by answering all the questions, etc etc, but they can be announced as DA'd just because the elders FEEL LIKE MAKING THE ANNOUNCEMENT. You don't have to do anything, because the elders, for the sake of EXPEDIENCY will make an announcement based on assumptions and appearances.

Bottom line: if they want to get rid of you, they will get rid of you. If they realize that you don't feel they have authority over you, they will DA you because they still have authority over everyone else in the congregation, and they consider you to be a threat to that authority.

Nice to know they're scared of me. They should be.

Love, Scully

Mum

Abaddon! Where have you been? Many of us have wondered about you. Someone even posted a thread about what must have happened to you. Please check in with us from time to time.

As for the subject at hand, I do feel for those who have family still on the inside. I have 2 family members on the inside, but I rarely have contact with them anyway, so I don't care what happens in my case. Since I live a couple of thousand miles away from where I lived as a JW and no JW's here know me, I don't really expect a call. But, as the French say, on ne sait jamais (one never knows)!

SandraC

wednesday

Sounds like we need our own 'witness protection program"

yrs2long

Along with Abaddon's comment (welcome back BTW), I remember talks being given in which it was stressed that if you're not witnessing (preaching), then you cannot be a witness. Do you think this approach might work? I am expecting a call anyday myself, unless I am already DA"D/DF'd and unaware of it.

I've been pondering on what I will say when asked the pivotal question. Is there anyone who has been successful at avoiding DF'ing without responding 'yes' to the question? So far, I plan to respond that I consider myself an inactive Jehovah's Witness.

Shakita

My husband and I are inactive. We are expecting to be contacted in the next 3 months. We will not meet with them, period. By meeting with them you are playing their game of cat and mouse. Guess which one you will be? We will not be toyed with by puppets who are controlled by a publishing company who got rich on the backs of poor brainwashed people like we were. If they DA us because we refuse to meet with them, then so be it.

Mrs. Shakita

riz

Abaddon! It's good to see you're still around. I missed your presence!

Happy New Year

Abaddon

Another Escapee; These guys were the dumbest elders I've ever met, and basically I just gave them a run around, seemingly compliant and regretful of how my marriage had gone (and therefore undfable), but sad and not ready to go back to meetings, although I still believed in god (and therefore undaable); when they then tried to do the 'well, you're living your life as a worldly person now, we need to keep the cong clean', THAT is when I hit them with the appropriate reference that showed by Soc rules I was not a JW, and therefore not dfable or daable. Hope that helps.

riz, yrs2long, Mum and others; thanks!! Nice to be back, you can send me my present now riz ;-)

bay64me

Seems like we've got to just sit tight and await the dreaded knock at the door.

The disfellowshipping has already started at my old hall. (Only one that I know of though)

rebel,

I know that sick, panicky feeling that you describe. I get it whenever I even think of them. Sometimes I wonder whether I should just write them a letter or even just tell them where to go, when they come and visit? Maby getting it all over and done with is what I need.

Disassociating inactive ones?

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