To Ugg

Jesika

Dearest Ugg,

I remember the first time I talked to you in chat. I loved talking with you, and miss doing so.

I saw your comment on the topic of having friends, and noticed you are posting at the same time of night I am.

I would love to speak with you again, and I consider you a friend. I am curious as to why I have seen you posting and not in chat anymore?

How are you?

Your email is locked, and I am pretty sure why due to previous conversations, but would like to talk to you, or if you could jump in chat so I could give you my email address.

You normally give short but good comments and I have been thinking about you alot lately since we haven't be able to talk.

This is done out of love and just wanted to let you know I am thinking about you.

LOVE YOU,

Jesika

hi jesika,,,,,,,thank you so much for the lovely thoughts.... i have a tendency to withdraw when i am not doing well....i am in therapy and slowly getting better...lots of pressure to get back into things on this end...i just feel worthless....jw scars you know...guilt that just doesn't end.....

i enjoy my time here on the "net".....that is my company...i live in a small town,,,small congregation you get the picture....no way out....you know the scene...no worldily friends,,,and i can't look at a witness,,,,

my personality is not mainstream...i say and do things different...i have a great tendency to come across really oddly...i say one thing,,,,and the way i say it or show it can be taken so different from what i meant....

i always feel bad when this happens,,,as it is hard to explain and undo what i have said...this has happened alot at work lately....i could never deal with it if i thought i hurt some one in chat..everyone here has gone through so much!!! i read the stories and just shudder at times...

so,,,because i am going through a "bad frame" right now,,,it is for myself that i have not been in chat lately...this will pass as i have had it before...too much spiritual pressure,,,then i can't deal with any thing else...everything seems like too much.

i know you all understand this.......ugg,,,of the wish i was stronger class

Prisca

(((((((ugg)))))))

I didn't realise you were still "in". I can understand how hard that would be for you, not to mention the other troubles you are dealing with.

For what it's worth, I always enjoy your posts, and I think you're a nice person.

Jesika

I understand what you are saying. I just want you to know no matter how hard or what you are going through, I AM here for you. I LOVE YOU unconditionally!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I want you to talk to me, and if you can't I understand that too.

I wish you the best, and I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I want you to email me at my aunt's email-------i can't post mine here: [email protected]

you can forward any email to her to me.

I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I hope you are doing well.

I want the best for you, and noone here will judge you for what you are going through.

I am NOT mainstream either!!!!

I onlly hope you email my aunt so I can talk to you. I LOVE YOU, and I want to talk to you.

So PLEASE EMAIL my aunt!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

a big kiss for you

rocky220

Hi Ugg, I dont know if you remember me but I remember you and have been reading your posts intently, let me extent the same invitation of support and friendship....who knows you just might have a lot of fun....and much love and support. Jesika is a great gal, I had the pleasure of meeting her at the Silentlambs march and let me tell you, she is a force of nature!!!!!!Let's do chat real soon and exchange e-mails!!!, your sis, rocky220

Granny Linda

Sorry Ugg, I'm not laughing at you by any means when I say I'm sitting here laughing about what you said regarding being different. My gosh, someone else who walks the same path I used to, and sometimes can still get that sense of self-induced weirdness. No offense meant, but we are not alone in that area. Hell, I think it's great knowing there are others out there that experience the same emotions and thinking at times. Great reminder that I'm really not so different.

Actually, Ugg, the people that help teach me self-esteem are those who I can say, "ok, made me look good!" because there many who will never reconize themselves in any mirror; just continue blaming other people, places, and things for their inabilities. I think it's neat when humans can admit their shortcomings without beating themselves up...like I did for years...like I can still do on occassion. So I say, Welcome to the World. And don't be so darn hard on yourself.

As for still being In the organization...how in the heck do you cope with that aspect? Gosh, for myself I'd probably be a raving crazy woman who felt so trapped...hum, like I used to be. Anyhow good cheers are sent your way.

granny

bikerchic

((((((ugg)))))

Thanks Jesika for this post I have been wondering the same about ugg, and feel the same also, I couldn't have said it better.

Well 'cept ugg you are a great person and have made a big impact here.

bc

LyinEyes

Isnt Jesika a sweetheart. I have had the pleasure of getting to know this little lady and she is truly geniune. Since Jesika doesnt live too far from me, about 3to 4 hours , Ihope to visit with her more.
We all need friends , I know that so well now.
Being a JW , Ugg, I was sounding just like you. Alone in a small town, small congregation of older folks who didnt talk much. I felt I was dying inside. I was so alone for some girl talk.

Since I have come here, I have bonded with several of the girls here and they make my life so much fuller. I am so busy being a wife and mother, and sometimes it is just good to have a few good girlfriends to whine too.....LOL.......I too, feel a little odd, because ,,, well,I am. But mostof us who have been locked away from the real world are to a point.

But get down still and tell myself,,, this too shall pass. I get in moods of feeling what a waste my life has seemed like and then I have to remind myself of all the good things I have and have accomplished.

I hope you know how much you are valued here Ugg. Hope you get over this bad hump in your life. We are all here , giving you a rope to hold on to. WHo knows when one of us will need your help one day , we all have those days.

Lots of hugs ,,,,, to Ugg, and Jesika for reaching out to someone..................Love , Dede

xenawarrior

(((((((((((((((ugg))))))))))))

Miss you!!! Hang in there and please remember there are lots of people here who care about you! Feel free to email me any time!!!

XW

P.S. And yes, thank you Jesika for posting this!!!!

Dutchie

(((Ugg))))

We sometimes forget that behind the screen names are real people, some who have limitations, and who are on this forum because they NEED to be here.

Thinking of you Ugg (with the skinny mommie).

To Ugg

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