Getting out!

by Auswop 14 Replies latest jw friends

  • Auswop

    My husband and I would like to get our kids (my step kids) out of this religion and we don't know where to
    begin. We hardly see them anymore, neither of them are baptisted and we don't know where to begin.
    Can someone help us. Thanks

  • larc

    You would have to provide a lot more information before we could even begin to give advice. How old are the kids? Who has custody and why? What is your religion? Why don't you get to see them?

  • Auswop

    They are JW's. Ages 14 and 12. Their mother, who is JW as well, doesn't want them around us, probably
    because we don't believe in it.

  • biblexaminer

    The fact is, the 'Easy come - easy go' scenario doesn't work with JWism. 'Easy come, tough to go' would be more apt.

    If you can get them over your house, and explain that you have been reading an old WT publication, the TRUTH BOOK, and do so in an honest appearing fashion, then you might explain that this book tells us that we should examine our religion in an honest light.

    If you can get that far, then you can mention that you have heard that 'JWs won't take their own advice'.

    Assuming they have not run out the door, at this point you can lay on them some facts about, well.... for instance the false prophecies galore or that the Wathctower supported Jimmy Swaggart's appeal for tax exemtion in California. Or some other goodie from the iNet.

    It might be good to hunt around for somebody xJW in your area who can tutor you on the proper technique. If you aren't 'good', then it will certainly backfire, and you will never see them again. Of this I assure you.

  • larc

    Do you have visitation rights and if not can you get them?

  • larc

    Do you have visitation rights, and if not, can you get them?

  • Andy_Bosi

    Under the circumstances, your husband and you are fighting an uphill battle.

    Because their mother is a JW, it's a sure thing that they are being brainwashed into the JW mindset. The best thing you can do is to try your best to include them in your family activities, to show that you love and care about them. At Christmas time, send them presents, without ever mentioning about the fact that JWs do not celebrate Christmas. Likewise w/ their birthdays. Encourage them to do well in school, to attend college when it's time, etc. Be supportive of what they are doing, while at the same time, stay away from religious discussions.

    What will NOT work is this: - directly attacking or ridiculing JW beliefs. If you do so, you are only playing to this cult's teaching, that the "world" is under Satan's control, and that Satan will do anything to discourage them from becoming good JWs.

    And if they have access to the Internet, gently mention to them, "there seems to be a lot of interesting websites about JWs, have you checked them out?"

    Maybe, as they get older, they will find JW beliefs to be controlling and ridiculous. Be there for them if/when that happens.

    Good luck,


  • Auswop

    I don't know of any xJW's. As far as visiting rights go, yes we do have them, by law, but the kids don't
    want to come over and my husband doesn't want to get the cops involved and drag them out of their house
    to come visit us. We both think that would be very harmful on them. So unless we can get to talk with
    them, there is really nothing that we can do at this point.

  • Auswop

    Andy_Bosi - We have done what you have said, when they were visiting us, we still did the Christmas,
    Birthday, etc. and not mentioning anything against JW's. Just doing the usual things that most of the world
    does. Their Mother even said once to me "My kids don't believe in Christmas or Birthdays but I told them
    to accept the presents anyway because that will be the only time their father will buy things for you". Now
    if that's not being a hypocrite, I don't know what is. As long as they were receiving material things, even
    if it was for birthdays and Christmas, then it was OK. They sure enjoyed getting all those presents.

  • hippikon

    Have either of you ever been involved with Jwdom?
    Why dont the kids want to visit?

    If I were you I would pretend to be interested and get closer. Keep your freinds close and your enimies even closer.

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