Therapy

Moxy

Hi all. Im breaking a long absence to ask a question during this evening of soul-searching in what I believe to be the best place to ask it. I dont know how many people are still here who remember me well, so first a 'hi and miss you guys' to those who are.

Im wondering about therapy. I always thought i had a pretty good handle on my life despite the upheaval of leaving the witnesses. Recent events in my life and advice from my freinds however, have led me to think I would benefit from talking thru some of these issues with a professional. It struck me that thinking back, I dont ever recall many words spared in this board (or others like it) on the subject, despite the cornucopia of topics discussed. I wonder now if its something that is somehow too personal to discuss (altho this hardly seems an impediment most of the time) or if perhaps this is because collectively (and Ive always believed this) ex-jws tend to carry a blind spot to the effects their upbringing have had on them.

Oh i know much has been said about the unhealthy aversion that JWs have to seeking therapy, and I believe a few have talked about how liberated they felt about getting therapy for issues that they left unchecked while a witness, because of the somewhat unspoken taboo on 'worldly' therapy. But what Im asking about it is therapy to resolve issues specifically related to life growing up as, and leaving, the witnesses.

I have lived my whole life surrounded by witness culture, including my entire family on all sides and wife, up until the age of 28, two years ago. The process of leaving, as you all know, is a long drawn out one, though certainly important parts of it happened very quickly, i.e. a sudden realization that it was all wrong. The process has taken me a lot of places mentally and emotionally and I know realize I potentially have a lot of unaddressed issues. I still think Im pretty on top of things, and well-balanced, and maybe more out of curiosity than anything, I would like to seek the help of a professional therapist in sorting things out.

How was it helped or not helped those who have discussed it with a therapist?

If you've never thought about it or decided not to pursue it, why not?

What particular types of therapy or therapist have you found helpful or not? (Spare me any discussion of anti-cult crusaders or 'deprogrammers,' for whom I have little respect.)

Im turning email notification on here. Feel free to email me directly too if you wish.

thx
mox

musky

Hello moxy, Personally, I have not benefitted much by any therapy. That is not to say I think its bad for all people though. I always thought the therapist and hospitals were more worried about how much insurance coverage i had. I certainly think you should go if you feel the need though. I hope all goes well with you.

myself

WB Moxy. One of my brothers finally saw a therapist after some self-destructive behavior. At least 80% of the problems went back to the jw religion (cult). He was never baptized, and left in his late teens. The issues in my opinion were pretty much resolved with therapy and time, although I think some may always haunt him.

ugg

hi,,,,i am in therapy,,and have been for 3 months...i am just now
starting to feel better...it is the best thing i have ever done...it
seems to be a slow process,,,but...always forward...

all areas of my life are being covered...there is just some thing about
talking,,,deep personal things,,,knowing that it will not be gossiped
about...

everybody is so different...if you are troubled,,give it a try,,,it will
not hurt anything and you might find some comfort...

i wish you the best...

peaceloveharmony

(((moxy))) great to hear from you :)

i've not yet done therapy but i say if you want to try it then go for it. can always stop going if you feel it's not doing anything for you. good luck to you. sorry i can't give ya any other info/advice.

proplog2

I have read hundreds of books on therapy. My conclusion is that you should contact the Albert Ellis Institute. They can help you find a good therapist in your area. His therapy is quick and cuts through the bull-shit

Click on the link below..

http://www.rebt.org

Good Luck (yes luck)

Farkel

: Im wondering about therapy. I always thought i had a pretty good handle on my life despite the upheaval of leaving the witnesses. Recent events in my life and advice from my freinds however, have led me to think I would benefit from talking thru some of these issues with a professional.

I did it after my divorce. At $100 per hour and with a very well-recommended therapist, it amounted to this:

1) The therapist let me say all kinds of bullshit and never called me on it. (At $100 per hour, I wouldn't open my mouth, either)

2) The entire therapy consisted of "you need to take care of yourself first and foremost. You are the most important person in your life, and don't you ever forget it."

Part two was worth all the money. As a dub, thinking a thought like that was the unforgiveable sin.

Therapists are great, but they charge $100 per hour and more. They are sort of like best friends, except they charge money to be your best friend, and they cease to be your best friend when you don't have any more money.

Best friends are better. If you have a best friend, go to him/her first and say all the shit you feel you need to say. Best friends can handle it, if they really ARE best friends. They don't charge $100 an hour, either. Maybe a pizza, but that's worth it.

Farkel

notperfectyet

So...what you're saying Farkel.is, you want a pizza?

Scully

Moxy:

Talk to your family doctor about therapy. If you're suffering from depression of the kind that might be attributed to JW upbringing, it is possible that OHIP will cover it, at least partially. You can also check with your employer, as they may have an Employee Assistance Program that allows for a few hours of counselling.

You can always try it, and if you don't feel that it's giving you what you were looking for, you can walk away from it without guilt. At least you'll know that you took a stroll down that path.

Another good idea, from a therapeutic point of view, is to keep a diary. It helps you reflect on your thoughts and things that are bothering you and then problem solve. You can also pick up your journal at times and see how much progress you've made over the weeks and months.

Good luck!

Love, Scully

wednesday

I agree with farkel , if your issues are not too serious, a best friend will help a lot. My issues were very serious and long standing and i had worn out all my friends. (even a good friend can only listen to so much). eventually i went into therapy and have been in theray for quite a while. I have gained a lot of help from it. Initaially, my therapy dealt with chilhood issues and things like that. Now it is more like the here and now . My therapist saw me when i had good insurance and when i was on medicare. money has not been soemthing that has come between us.

Therapy

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