?when *do* pedos find chances to abuse
teejay,
As your daughter gets a bit older, you will find the day when you turn her over to someone else's care. Kindergarten. Sunday school. Dance classes. Swimming lessons.
To you as a concerned parent, these should be milestones to celebrate. They should also be dates where you go to DefCon3, asking probative questions, demanding to see proper documents of qualification, requesting references of everyone involved in the program, taking no bullsh*t answers and walking away from any program that balks at your requests or is too poorly organized to meet your requests.
The pedophile relies on these gaps in organization, and seeks out opportunities to be involved in children's programs where he or she can be in a position of authority over the children.
Condition your children to reject inappropriate adult remarks or advances, but the child also needs a plan as to how to do this. If your daughter's piano teacher demands proper finger placement during scale practice then she should obey, even if it is frustrating. If the piano teacher instructs finger placement anywhere on his body, she needs to know not just the difference, but what to do to get out of there safely.
I've had the satisfaction of doing my small part to bust a pedophile. The man was training to be a Lifeguard, in fact we got him arrested on his final test day to get his certificate. None of this would have happened if it were not for the fact that his little victim knew what to do and though he was obviously very embarassed to even tell the story, he had total confidence that he was not at fault.
There used to be a monthly magazine called National Lampoon. They had one issue in the 1970's that had a cover that featured a cute puppy with a gun to it's head. The cover read: "Buy This Magazine Or We Will Shoot This Dog". It remains Lampoon's biggest selling issue.
The pedophile is not beyond actually using such tactics to shut up a child. Showing the child an animal that will be strangled if they talk or demonstrating such is not uncommon. Parents must maintain an unstoppable trust with their children so that even this tactic does not accomplish what the pedophile wants: a child who won't tell.
You don't have to toughen up your child to meet this challenge, you just need a kid who will say "I'll Tell!" And then you have to be ready to listen.
Eric
