Should you carry "I Want Blood" card

by MegaDude 9 Replies latest jw friends

  • MegaDude
    MegaDude

    Chatting with Elsewhere last week, I was surprised and not surprised that he wanted legal documents drawn up that would give medical and legal power of attorney over him NOT to his family, but rather to ex-JWs he knows if he became incapacitated or was killed. He knows his JW relatives would not follow his wishes. Elsewhere is a devout atheist for one and the very thought of his parents having a JW minister (or any minister for that matter) saying a few words over his final resting place is a repugnant thought to him. I truly understand that.

    Which made me wonder, how many of us have legal documents to keep JW relatives from causing complications should we unfortunately be injured or worse? Especially in cases where you might be the ONLY member of your JW family who has broken free from the Watchtower. Would they try to prevent you from, say, getting a needed procedure that involved blood or a currently Watchtower banned blood product? In the event a person becomes medically incapaciated, hospitals usually call the first relative they can find for go-ahead, I understand.

    I'm taking a few steps to make my wishes are adhered to that I hadn't thought about. For one, all of my "in case of emergency" contact numbers are to my parents. However, my non-JW father is not always at home and my mother is a fanatical hardcore JW type. I will be changing those numbers to my sisters who are ex'ers and I trust to follow my wishes.

    I have medical/legal documents already drawn up, but unless someone was digging through my "documents box" with care, they certainly wouldn't be easy to find. I'll be getting copies to my sisters next week so they will know exactly what to do in case of an unfortunate emergency and so they will already know exactly where the paperwork is. I'm going to encourage them to do the same.

    I'm not as concerned about how my funeral or non-funeral will be conducted. However, if Elsewhere wants, I will be happy to take care of getting "Bite Me, Watchtower" chiseled on his tombstone despite his JW parents' objections. I'm not so sure about the inverted cross.

    Edited by - megadude on 6 September 2002 8:46:29

    Edited by - megadude on 6 September 2002 8:47:51

  • Sam Beli
    Sam Beli

    Excellent points MD. I have the same concern. Recently I spoke to my primary physician and told her of the dilemma within my family, most are JWs. She promised to put a note in my chart to the effect that, if necessary, blood products would be used if I was unable to give consent.

    Your idea of creating (sorry for using that word Elsewhere) a paper trail is also wise, it seems to me.

    Thanks for the suggestion.

    Sam

  • RunningMan
    RunningMan

    I have often wondered about that. Every year I hold a ceremonial destruction of my "no blood" card. After it is filled out, signed, and witnessed, I take it to work, slice it up, and throw it away.

    This, however, is probably not enough. If I were unconcious, my relatives would speak for me, and would likely try to kill me by prohibiting blood.

    I have contemplated the idea of creating my own card, called "yes, blood", and mimicking the Society's wording, only in reverse.

    Something like, "In the event that I am unable to speak for myself, I hereby empower the finder of this card to take any steps necessary to prevent my brain-dead Jehovah's Witness relatives from killing me by refusing essential medical treatment. This has been my firm stand for __ years."

    Edited by - RunningMan on 6 September 2002 13:32:5

  • Navigator
    Navigator

    Megadude

    Changing your emergency numbers to your sisters is a good idea, but you can rest assured that any JW funeral for you will be over Navigator's dead body.

  • Joyzabel
    Joyzabel

    Welcome to the board, Navigator.

    May I assume you are dude's daddy????

    Nice to see you are supportive of your children.

  • LyinEyes
    LyinEyes

    Very good ideas megadude........ We have no active JW family to stop us from receiving blood. My Dad is a very active JW , but he has acted like I am dead for over a year and I hope no one tells him if I do die. It would be so funny to me if he didnt find out for a couple of years after the fact. He also doesnt know that I am D/A , as far as I know. If he does, he sure could care less, he must be happy with my choice, just a good excuse to throw me out of his life, and he doesnt have to call me once a year anymore.... arsehole!!!!!!!!!!!!

    I have told my hubbys family, who are not D/f yet,,, but soon probably,,,,,,, that I want blood if I need it,,,,,,and that I will give blood to my 3 children and husband too. They have the same thoughts we do about it, and it is just pure luck......... yeah I said luck,,,,heehhe that I didnt die on three occasions because of the "blood issue". When my youngest son was born 2 months early with alot of medical problems, I already decided, even thou I beleive in Jehovah and still an active witness, that I would secretly give him blood. And I would risk getting d/f , because I couldnt bare to go thru losing him,but glad that at the time he pulled thru like a fighter.

    I had to laugh at what you said Runningman,,,,,,,,,,,, the yearly ritual of destorying the blood card.hehheee

    One of the first things I did when I decided I didnt believe JW anymore , before we really left,,was to tear my blood card up in as many little pieces as possible. I asked my husband to take his out of his wallet and destory it too, and he did.

    Runningman you should post your rewritten "I really do want blood card", that would be hilarious.

    I also want to be an organ donor and plan to put that in writing, I see no need in taking with me, something that could help someone eles to live.

  • MegaDude
    MegaDude

    Thanks Navigator! In the event of my untimely demise, please borrow the very sturdy cat 'o nine tails from the District Overbeer and sternly admonish any JWs there. Heh, heh.

    Edited by - megadude on 6 September 2002 18:20:11

  • Jade
    Jade

    Bro,

    You know I will look out for you :)

    Jade

  • VeniceIT
    VeniceIT

    Ahh that's in interesting idea Jerry hmmmm!!!!! We could make some cards

    All this family love ohh my it warms my heart and ohh dang I'm all choked up!!!!*sniff**sniff*

    Ven

  • kevin221
    kevin221

    LyinEyes,

    I would emplore you to get absolute legal documention of your wishes. I know you trust your husbands family to carry out your wishes, and I'm sure they would do so if the occasion should ever arise (knocking on wood, crossing fingers and toes, and wishing it never does), but take it from me, you can never know for sure what your current JW family will do. I can tell you from experience that it is 100% necessary to have your wishes legally documented. I have recently had to deal with the death of a loved one who had JW relatives so I know what can happen. Without the legal documents that were in my possesion, his family would have been given full rights to make legal and medical decisions without my consent and I would have had no legal recourse. Sorry to ramble but I just want you understand that even though you don't think your JW family would interfere, you can never be 100% sure. Even after 20 years of shunning, some of my partners family came out of the woodwork and caused some major trouble, and I wouldn't want anyone else to have the same experience.

    Take care,

    Kevin

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