Transitions after leaving the borg..experiences?

by LyinEyes 21 Replies latest jw friends

  • Shutterbug
    Shutterbug

    Dede, I receive my spiritual satisfaction by drinking coffee on the patio early in the morning and listening to the birds, viewing a beautiful sunset, watching a bird eating outside outside my window, taking my camera and looking for what may turn out to be a good pic, associating with fellow ex JW's just for starters. Visiting my kids, learning new things, reading a good book. The earth is a beautiful place, enjoy it. Bill

  • refiners fire
    refiners fire

    22 YEARS OUT OF THE ORG HERE.

    Since leaving Ive examined most of the other options. About the only thing i havent given a try is Islam.

    Ive been in the Mormons, the Adventists, the pentecostals and Catholic church, the right wing militia movement and the Ascended Masters spiritualist movement. Ive been involved in more New Age trance channeling groups than I can begin to recount. After all of that I have not seen an organized belief that does not have cultic manifestations and controls the flock. Its a worry I tell you. I cannot find any systematic faith that I can hold onto in good conscience.

    Edited by - refiners fire on 2 September 2002 19:59:30

  • garybuss
    garybuss

    *

    LyinEyes wrote:

    "Do you think that being a JW , especially raised in it, has taken away your chance of ever trusting yourself ever again in regards to what you believe in?"

    On the contrary. My experience has been a wonderful reference point. I have trust, faith, and belief now like never before.

    What I can't afford today is misplaced trust, blind faith, and belief in dead men's delusions.

    Today, I rely on the obvious, the predictable, the rational, the practical, the objective, and the real. I treat people like it is the last time I will ever see them. I plan for the future but live for today. I enjoy enjoyment and I appreciate people with good behavior. I am learning to accept the unacceptable and I avoid confrontation.

    Success is friends and security is health. Love is action and my best deals in life have been the bad deals I got out of.

    All the rest is work in progress.

    gb


    *

  • Perry
    Perry

    Dear Lyin Eyes,

    If there is no right and wrong, what right do we have to judge the WTBS for their lying, hypocritical abuses? The truth is that there is right and wrong and it is our destiny to discover what it is.

    To suggest otherwise is to deny our position as top animal on this planet. The borg is evil because it is self serving. Being unselfish is one key to truth and is a trustworthy benchmark to judge our friends, ourselves and our associations that we support.

    You will find peace in time....when you find acceptance.

  • Big Tex
    Big Tex

    Wow, great question. I started studying when I was 9, and stayed in until I was 27. I really really believed it, and left much against my will. I used to wonder why so few Witnesses joined other religons when they left, and now I think I understand. I think it's kind of like being in an abusive relationship. You might really love the person, but when they beat the holy hell out of you time and again, then blame your beating on your shortcomings, it creates a level of shame and mistrust that is very difficult to overcome. I think one thing many of us have in common is that innocence, that almost child-like trust that we all have, but then was used and twisted. We have left and count ourselves lucky for having gotten out, but that scar is still there. We will never have that innocent trust and belief that we once had. So for many of us, we are hesitant to join another organised spiritual group. Once burned, twice shy. I wish I had the answer about what to do next. At this point in my life, I only know where I DON'T belong. But I also believe that God has a certain responsibility in this matter. I choose to believe that if, and that's a big if, God wants us to be in a certain building, or belong to a particular religon, then it is his responsibility to let us know. I don't know if it will take a burning bush, but I do believe that if our eternal life/damnation depends on what seat our butt is parked in, then God owes it to us to tell us where.

  • JT
    JT

    when one leaves there are only 2 issues that one must come to grips with

    1. Do I join another "Belief system" as one poster REFINER STATED:

    "Since leaving Ive examined most of the other options. About the only thing i havent given a try is Islam.

    Ive been in the Mormons, the Adventists, the pentecostals and Catholic church, the right wing militia movement and the Ascended Masters spiritualist movement. Ive been involved in more New Age trance channeling groups than I can begin to recount. After all of that I have not seen an organized belief that does not have cultic manifestations and controls the flock. Its a worry I tell you. I cannot find any systematic faith that I can hold onto in good conscience."

    For many we have realized that for the most part all major belief system share the same common thread

    "We got the Hookup with god over here and if you don't join us our god will Kill you"

    while there are different variations of this thread they are basically the same- when was the last time a "Christian believer told a Muslium he was on the road to salvation, but then again when was the last time a Muslium told a christian that"

    once one come to realize that for the most part you are just changing one control group for another( some are High control , while others are Low control) you still got the same basic thing.

    then one moves on to step #2, after questioning belief systems the only thing left is to examine and question the one who represented by so many "belief systems" AKA: god/divine one/ man upstairs/allah, etc. for one is left to ask the question

    2. And where was "god" when I along with millions of others were wasting our lives for an Amercian corp call WT. If it had not been for Techonology and the Net many of us would still be in wt selling books, WE know it was not by the hand of "god" that we got out for if that is true then he is pretty sad to leave 6million folks behind

    while many of us realize that the avg jw is involved in a HIgh Control group and therefore does many things based on a wrong foundation, is it not interesting that while we know that the avg jw has no idea why he does what he does beyond because "THE SOCIETY SAYS SO" -

    the god of most belief systems watches and sees all these honest hearted ones just wasting thier lives,

    looking back i sincerely believed that the choices in life i made - NO COLLEGE, no retirement, no blood if it came to it was solidly based on the word of god and yet the god of most belief systems watched you and i struggle and suffer for no reason--- esp as "Kids" in school, all the pain that JW kids will face on September 11th in a few days is going to be unreal.

    i think back to when i was in the 3rd or 4th grade and the issue of nationalism came up O HOW IT HURT TO BE laughed at and poked fun at, and the only comfort that mom could give you was that you were being like the 3 hebrew boys,-

    now with the help of the net i and so many others realize we got Hoodwinked and Bamboozled and just think the "god" of most belief system watched and DID NOTHING

    i will not even mention all those who died, at least we all didn't have to give up our life, , but for many depending upon thier age when they get out of wt they often feel like they did give up thier life

    what quality of life can a JW who is 70 upon leaving wt enjoy - all his most productive years are gone in behalf of a belief system that was a joke

    so for some who leave wt they first examine the concept of "Belief Systems" and then they reexamine what they have been taught about the "Divine one"

    yes it is indeed a transition when leaving wt

    james

  • sisteract
    sisteract

    hi lyin eyes,

    i walked away back in 1997, and it has been quite an emotional rollercoaster. i felt like Rip Van Winkle waking up and now having to get acquainted with the world again. i feel strongly that i was "spritually raped". i gave my youth, my time, my assets, my will, and my whoe being to this CULT. i feel i was taken advantage of and the best parts of me were exploited for the "truth". i know i'm not alone here in my feelings and experiences within the WT. i don't think i'll ever be a part of an organized religion again. the thought of it is most DISTASTEFUL to me. it took me a long time to trust my own judgements and gut feelings, but i do for the most part. it's everyone else i'm not sure about. my sister once said to me that "everyones an asshole until they prove different to me." i've met wonderful and beautiful people upon leaving that i never would have the pleasure of knowing if i was still in. i see GOODNESS as i never have before, but i also believe there is EVIL in this world that i can't explain. i think i'm a spiritual person for me, and i no longer care what others think of me. there is a FREEDOM that i truly enjoy. but there isn't a day that goes by yet where i don't think of those left behind or the "lost years" of my life. with each day, month and year since i've left i feel more at peace than i ever did before.

    geez, i didn't mean to ramble i hope my small experience was in some way helpful to you.

  • LyinEyes
    LyinEyes

    I really appreciate all of the responses you all have given. It really makes me see that we all really do have some of the same questions, and the same unanswered ones at that...LOL.

    I do think that life is something that evolves everyday and things change from moment to moment. I enjoyed hearing what you all think, because there is a sense of belonging in that I feel I belong in to a wonderful group of people. A group of ever growing ex jw's who are trying to find a place in this world for them. I guess we are doing just that, and it is good to be able to be free to express that we are part of this world and that regardless of what the WT says,,,,,,,, we are darn happy to be part of it.

    I guess the peace I am looking for , is already inside me........ I just need to let it be free, and it is happening , alot faster than I thought it would leaving the borg. I just can't wait to see how I feel at 50 , then at 70 and then when I am at this life's end. It does seem like an incredible journey.

    By all of your comments, it has helped me to think of not being afraid of what the future holds. I will remember the things you have all said and each day , live for the day and be grateful for friends like you all. You all are so very honest and non judgemental, thanks for that. Loveya , Dede

  • dsgal
    dsgal

    Lyin eyes,

    My feelings are that I don't need organized religion to be pleasing in God's eyes.He reads the heart and when it comes right down to it,it's between each individual and him.How do some of those who are turning in 70 hours a month know they will be saved,if they don't have the right heart attitude?

  • Beck_Melbourne
    Beck_Melbourne

    Hi dede

    Interesting thread. I have no interest in God, religion, spirituality, bible, religion etc, I only feel an empty nothing. I don't have a hunger for knowledge or truth, I don't have any unanswered questions (apart from life after death) and I don't want to investigate or explore anyone else's beliefs or teachings.

    That is MY transition from jw believer and practicer to what I am today, spiritually speaking.

    The great mystery of life after death will be answered in its own time I guess...until then...come what may....but I'm not looking for it.

    Love to you and yours this month Dede

    Beck

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