Many of us still have JW family still very much held within the congregation.
Personally, I love my family but they do have this uncanny ability at times to absolutely drive me nuts in sheer exasperation. The things particularly that really gets my goat are the following:
The hypocrisy. Many people cannot stand hypocrites and I'm one of them. People that make a pretense on the outside to be all things truthful and standing for what is upright and righteous, yet the underlying attitude is one of 'do as I say not as I do'. To most people they are the utter resemblance of reasonableness, yet just underneath the surface is an embittered and twisted personality that seeks only their own self interest, not the putting of others interests first. They seek to look pure, clean and trustworthy, yet they have an alteriour motive that seeks to destroy and not upbuild in any regard. I can't stand / abide by these double standards, kept unseen from others in the congregation.
The lies. Lying to themselves, justifying their actions, justifying everything they do in the name of God, yet not really knowing Him, or having an open relationship with Him. Afraid to face the real truth, resorting to tactics involving theocratic warfare and hatred for others, despising everything other people do and taking every opportunity to dismiss others thoughtful and compassionate deeds.
Anger. Bitter words, designed to bring the other person down to their level. To congregational members they appear the most calm and loving individuals, yet in home life, a different truth is displayed, including emotional blackmail and any number of other tactics that essentially anywhere are considered just downright rudeness. OK, take my father for example. For a good part, a very kind man, but despite often complaints to the elders regarding his anger problems, no action is ever taken, WHY? Why one rule for one but not the other? If the elders were to realise the full extent of his anger problems, the man would have been kicked out donkey's years ago. This gets my goat, especially the justification of his behaviourial psychology, his emotional makeup.
With your family, can you add to this list? Does your family also since you left treat you in a spirit of mildness or more in tune as an excuse, the spirit of the flesh? What justifications do they give you for their actions? How many of you have been 'stumbled' by your families attitudes both now and long gone in the past?
Celtic Mark - Cornwall UK
edited for spelling error in Subject Title
Edited by - Celtic on 20 August 2002 9:49:2