Hi Gravedancer: I don't know of any post or poster who has stated or implied that most JWs are molesters, rather that most JWs are blind to and ignorant of the pedophiles in their midst ... unaware of the dangers posed to their young minor children. Most Jws are not aware of the Watchtower policies that have shielded the pedophiles from prosecution. The victims and their parents are aware, but are under threat not to talk about the problem unless they be DF'd for slandering the pedophile. That is the issue.
Every hall that we have direct knowledge of has had an abuse problem in the UK - one is an ongoing case which I will be able to post more information about soon.
So what's that? 100%? Sure, a limited sample but it should be the exception rather than the rule which it appears.
I think many people who visit may be sadly nodding their heads when they read some of the accounts thinking "yeah, that's what happened in out hall too" or else they have just not heard about it yet.
People should never make things up but just claiming that there seems to be too many people coming forward is a mistake.
I'll bet that the majority of the posters here know at least 1 person that's been molested that was a JW.
I knew personally 2 JW molesters and one JW rapist.
I knew hundreds of JW's while I was in, and the vast majority were not molesters or rapists. But knowing three, in an organization claiming to be God's PURE organization, is too many.
The two molesters were eventually disfellowshipped. One was actually reported to the authorities and prosecuted. Nothing at all happened to the rapist; his dad was an elder.
Fot a long time I thought that Silentlambs were over sensationalising a minor problem. But I have been convinced by the huge weight of evidence from so many people , and the T V both here and in the U S . There IS a large problem. And the borg has been criminally negigent in dealing with it .
Having said that , vast majority of the dubs I have known have been lovely individuals with high moral standards - but as they have said themselves , "You cannot be tolerant of evil in ones midst"
Who do I know:
Myself and all my siblings by our JW father who was protected by our JW mother
A sister by her JW stepfather
A brother by an elder in his congregation
Another brother by an elder in his congregation
A sister by her JW father
Her friend by that JW father
The elders try to keep it secret and threaten those who know anything with DF'ing or marking if they tell anyone. Just because you don't hear about it doesn't mean it hasn't happened. That is why it is so important for the elders to keep people from going to the police. Then it does get in the news and the elders can't hide it any longer and the WTS can't control the flow of information. Somehow there threats of DFing have little effect on the legal system.
Child abuse is like an iceberg, only 1/9 of it is visible above the water.
Edited by - Blondie on 15 August 2002 14:14:25
When I first started hearing about child abuse among JWs on these boards, I thought, "Oh, it's like in our congregation--an isolated incident here and there, with really stupid elders." Because that's what I'd thought for more than 25 years--that what went on in our congregation was an aberration; that other congregations surely did not mistreat victims and harbor perpetrators. Because that's what my JW mother had told me: "These are imperfect men. We'll wait on Jehovah."
So the shock of finding out that my experience seems to be the norm rather than an aberration has taken quite a bit to get over. I have not told my story to silentlambs or on this board, and have no intention of doing so until and unless the therapy I am pursing seems to indicate it is the appropriate thing to do for my own healing process. What I will say is that I bless Bill Bowen and all his supporters for the work they are doing, both to protect JW children from being victimized in the future, and to facilitate healing for those of us who have survived.
And it is, in many ways, a relief to know that I am not alone.
I am with OZ on this issue.
I know of one elder who had 5 sisters accuse him of improper sexual conduct "abuse". One was my daughter another a non jw 2nd cousin to my daughter.
Notified the elders and what was done? Nothing. This elder pranced around anouncing that he had been completely exonerated.
I fully expect some of this conduct to happen in any organization or religion. As they are only a mirror of society as a whole. Regardless of what the wbts says about the righteousness of the body of jehovah's witnesses
What troubles me so, is the refusal to acknowledge the problem or to recognize the complete failure of the wbts to cope with the problem of Sexual abuse in the organization.
But most of all, I am troubled by the arrogant, hateful, response and actions they take toward those who are brave enough to expose them for what they are. A self appointed holier than thou bunch of men who it seems have no ability to accept the fact that they have by their actions or lack of action caused great trauma and injustice to victims of sexual abuse. and need to step up like the God fearing christian they claim to be and APOLOGIZE for their inability to see the need and deal with it a long time ago.
I believe it is these frustrations, THIS HURT, that I see in my daughter and in myself that causes some if not all of us here to seem a bit fanatic or over the edge at times. There is nothing as frustrating and angering as watching the powerful abuse and use the helpless and scoff at actions to stop this conduct. Also not only scoff but to say things like "we don't change for anybody". Would that make you go over the edge?
Edited by - outoftheorg on 15 August 2002 19:37:4
omg, I have to agree with Gravedancer on something. My tummy hurts.
I am amazed that people cannot even understand what I wrote.
Maybe it's you and not the people?