This is what the Society does to people

by rem 18 Replies latest jw friends

  • unanswered
    unanswered

    rem, trevor, others-there's not much i can say that hasn't been said already on this but my feelings go out to all of you. it makes me sad that this kind of thing happens as much as it does and that a supposedly "loving" org. breaks up so many familys. welcome to the board, rem, i hope the support here helps you with your situation.-nate

  • Welshman
    Welshman

    Hi guys,
    Remember what we always used to be told.....Don't make friends with the world,but find 'true friends'in 'Jehovah's organisation.Yeah sure.....who'll drop you like a smelly turd as soon as you ask challenging questions about the WTBS or their religion.......
    For the average dub,a friend 'in need' is a pain in the ass....Remember the glazed look kingdom smile,I still have memeories of that fixed on some people's faces.
    Then one day you realize what you suspected was true all along...nothing but a con.One of the more sickening of the many realisations that cross your mind..Good post rem.
    not a kingdom smile...

    Regards Welshman

  • teejay
    teejay

    Rem,

    sorry for the (hopefully) temporary disruption of a friendship. although it's too late for you, your experience carries with it a reminder of at least two meaningful lessons.

    1) dubs don't have real dub friends. every dub relationship hinges on one's current level of acceptance, meaning "in good standing."

    2) if you do have dub "friends" and you have begun to think for yourself and see considerable chinks in the Society's theology, keep your mouth shut, even if they are your "closest friends." those bound by marital commitments have even been turned in by their mates, just like good Nazis did during WWII and others have done at other times.

    there are no easy answers to your situation and it may take some time (years, if then) for the matter to resolve itself. you have our thoughts, and in the case of some, prayers.

    peace.

  • Uncanny
    Uncanny

    Considering the fact that you are not formally disassociated, or even disfellowshipped, what sort of 'religion' is the WTBS where its rank and file followers who claim to be your friends - the very kind who are supposed to be willing to die for you - can take it upon themselves to judge you adversely and then cut you off like a man of the nations?

    The way you have been treated, rem, is surely the very antitheseis of Jesus' teachings about showing love and is insulting to a true Christian's expected code of moral conduct.

    Uncanny

  • happytobefree
    happytobefree

    .....We have hoped and prayed that one day you would turn back to Jehovah's love and his people,......

    WHAT LOVE?

    This is a sad affair when even parents cannot love THEIR OWN CHILDREN. The JW religion, make me so ill some days. I don't have words to describe my feelings at the time.

    But I REALLY pray that we will all LEARN to do without people who want to give such fu**** up love.

    Happy to be Free (Me)

  • dedalus
    dedalus

    I'm glad you wrote out this experience -- it's really well done, well written. I followed the link to the letter, which was so typically done. And what I mean is this: no matter how creatively we word things, no matter how loving and pleading and reassuring we are, we are always met with the same terse answers.

    What is that deal about "protecting our spirituality," anyway? I can't see my 18 month old nephew because my brother is "protecting the child's spirituality." Protecting it from what? All I have to offer the kid is love, kindness, generosity, playfulness ... So my question is, when did the "fruits of the spirit" and other virtues become threats to one's spirituality?

    Thanks for your recent e-mail, by the way. I'll reply soon.

    Dedalus

  • thinkers wife
    thinkers wife

    Welcome Rem and any others I have missed . This is unfortunately so typical of the Witness mindset.
    I have experienced this with my best friend, whom I had the dubious honor of studying with.
    I cannot understand how you can turn love for someone on and off like a water faucet. It is conditional apparently. How sad for them, that they can't understand the concept of unconditional love.
    It doesn't make it any easier for those of us who have experienced it from the other side though does it?
    TW

  • rem
    rem

    Thanks Dedalus,

    I was hoping to receive at least SOME response from the card I sent my friend... but nothing. I have had a chance to talk with his wife a few times, though. She doesn't seem to see me as much of a threat to her spirituality - she knows her husband has a habit of overreacting. She is such an intelligent girl. I fear that she may find out the truth someday, but late in life when it might all seem like a waste.

    It is sad that you can't have a relationship with your nephew - all because of irrational fear. If only our families could see that we have not chosen our path to hurt them or to live a morally debauched lifestyle, but rather to live the best life we know how - by being honest with ourselves. We can only hope that things will change someday.

    Good seeing you pop up here and there on the net,

    rem

  • joelbear
    joelbear

    On a recent visit home to see my parents, I asked my father (a witness elder and a faithful witness for 56 years) who he considered his closest friends. His reply was that he had no friends. When my mother (also a witness for 56 years) disagreed with him, he became violently angry and insisted that he had no friends.

    I wanted to ask what he felt were the advantages of being a Jehovah's witness if in 56 years he had made no friends there, but I didn't.

    I can't recall knowing any Jehovah's Witnesses that were very happy.
    Can anyone here?

    hugs

    Joel

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