I have been posting on this forum for a year now. "Only" 2000" were registered when I came here back in July 2001 after lurking for a few months. I was using another name at that time.
My first post was on the infamous "Noah's Ark" thread. I still marvel when I think about RedHorsewoman's figures about feed, room, and ummm...dung (not to be confused with "beetle") removal to completely debunk the possibility of such an event actually occurring.
A few people know about "my story." I never sat down and shared the whole thing. It's just too complicated. What brought me here, however, was a few of my JW relatives finding me after decades of shunning. *I* wasn't personally shunned, my Mother was and I was ignored as part of the package. The 1981 thing. That is another long story that I have shared in bits and pieces on this forum. My family "left" when I was 10. Things should have been great, but because my Father was a heavy drinking alcoholic, with lunatic tendencies, my life, and that of my siblings, were lived constantly on the edge.
I've shared a few those experiences here.
Suffice to say that if I lined up all those experiences, shared and unshared, in a row, I should be in a padded cell, put away, never to be heard from again. Yet, I'm not. I'm a happily married housewife with two kids. Life ain't always grand, but I like to think I have been able to piece together something worthwhile and meaningful.
My Father is currently a JW after many years of being active and then inactive. Right now, as far as I know, he is active. I have not spoken to him in over a year for non-jw reasons. I cannot blame the WTS for the destruction of my immediate family. However, my extended family is another story. Many of those I was close to growing up.
I remember when I realized my family could now be "normal." Or rather, not be JW's. I felt such a relief. I never wanted to talk anything Watchtower again. I didn't have to live with my impending death "any time now" because of my secret desire to attend a schoolmates birthday party, or because I gratefully accepted those tiny cards kids exchange at school on Valentine's Day. The stress between my Father's maniacal temperament and my "death wishes" actually took a toll on my physical health.
So when we left, I bolted. I never spoke of my families affiliation with the WTS with other kids. Fitting in is difficult enough without displaying the JW tattoo on my gums. I ran far away and my WTS memories were safely locked away, hopefully to be forever forgotten. For the most part, they were.
So, I fast forward to my JW relatives finding "us." For me, the WTS was another oddball religion with strange beliefs. Yet, they were harmless. I soon found out otherwise. I found site after site with sad stories of destruction. I couldn't stop reading. The feelings of shock and anger washed over me. Through Freeminds I found this Discussion Board. So many that I could relate to. They spoke my unique dialect.
So, it's been a year. I have had exchanges with so many great people. A few not so great, but that is life! The personality board has changed somewhat as more newbies register and some "oldies" fade. Though, I find the core is still the same. The support, the debates, and the wars (not many of those these days, thank goodness!).
I know I have jumped around with this. I hope it makes sense.
Thanks to Simon, and his lovely wife, for all their hard work, and money, they put into this place. I like hanging out here.
Andee