Short doctrine

by Bang 11 Replies latest jw friends

  • Bang

    Can you briefly sum up the teachings of the wtbts?

    eg "Boo" or "God is actually an asshole, this way out"


  • LittleToe

    In order of implied importance:

    • Pay us lots of donations for the free literature
    • Spend all your free time reading or selling it
    • Do what we say and you might live forever
    • Stand out in every way possible, esp. Re: Holidays
    • Be scared because God is a coming
    • The bible is good, but our literature is better
    • Wait on God because everything will all be alright in the end
    • God's name is Jehovah so your religion must have his name
    • Jesus is a nice angel, who hangs out with God
    • Jesus did some nice things on earth, so we can live there
    • All bad things are because of the bad angel Satan
    • Repeat the above 1000 times, or until fully indoctrinated

    Recent literature shows that 1914, Blood, 144,000, etc. are now no longer doctrines that require to be understood before baptism (albeit still mortally binding). Please form an orderly queue for bible studies.

    Facial hair poll:

  • refiners fire
    refiners fire

    P R E A C H and

    M A R C H I N S T E P

  • Amazing

    Added to the above:

    Shut up and don't ask questions.

    Asking questions is questioning the organization, which is to question God.

    Don't engage in independant thinking because it might lead to asking questions.

    We have been appointed to think for you, so trust us, for we are thinking persons and know how to think.

    If you don't obey orders perfectly, you are DF'd out of our club.

    In fact, we can DF you for any reason, at any time, without prior notification.

    God rules from the top down, the GB is near the top and the rank and file are on the very bottom.

  • zenpunk

    God loves a miserable and brainwashed people.

  • SpiceItUp

    "serve the GB or die"

  • minimus

    everything we say is from God. anything wrong we may say is because we are all imperfect. since everything we say is from God, do as we say and even if we, as imperfect humans are wrong, whatever you do, you are doing God's will.

  • Jesika

    I couldn't have put it any better than Spice did.

    "serve the GB or die"

  • funkyderek

    There are only two rules:

    1. The Governing Body is always right.

    2. If the governing body is wrong, see Rule Number 1.

  • City Fan
    City Fan

    Thou must lead a double life. Oh, and no masturbating!

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