So What Was A Cause For Stumbling For You, Then?

by Englishman 17 Replies latest jw friends

  • Englishman
    Englishman

    I recall vividly my teenage years when I was the eldest son of a colourful PO. Until you have spent several days residing at the home of the PO of a large congregation, you can have no idea what sagas and dramas are played out day after day by the publishers in many congregations.

    Publishers, MS's, Elders, they all want the ear of the PO. In effect, many publishers become totally unable to make even the smallest decision without first of all contacting the PO. I've even known it happen that a male has asked the PO to view the ministry record card of a sister, prior to him proposing marriage.

    One of the commonest causes for a publisher to contact his PO is because he feels that he has been "stumbled". We used to have one chappy in the Gosport area who would call round every week, because, as he would say, "I've been stumbled".

    Now this fellow was actually a group-study conductor, but as I quickly realised, he was also an inveterate gossip and trouble-maker. In short he was a SH*T stirrer!

    So, for him, the phrase "I've been stumbled" was actually a prelude to a telling of tales, a revealing of other people's faults, an opportunity to grass on anyone who had displeased him. Being "stumbled" was a golden opportunity for this gossippy chappy to bathe in the limelight!

    I recall a visit to a sister who had "been stumbled" by the behaviour of several of the congregations ministerial servants. When pressed as to what it was that was holding her back, she eventually sobbed out that it was "the sight of so many brothers pouring out of the pub at closing time". It was pointed out to her that it was not possible for her to even see the pub from her lounge window, so how could she be continually stumbled by the sight of brothers entering or leaving the pub? She replied: "But I can see them if I stand on a chair!"

    Again, here in WSM, I recall a very interested person having her Bible study stopped because she had not ceased to visit a boy friend at his home. This was so that the brothers would not be "stumbled".

    So what is all this about "being a cause for stumbling"? Surely, most JW's use this phrase purely as an excuse to manilpulate others or to suppress natural emotions and behaviour. The real causes for stumbling amongst Jehovahs witnesses stems from their system of eldership which separates people from their loved one's, hides paedophiles behind secret documents and keeps people from having live saving medical treatment.

    In short, all causes for stumbling amongst JW's are actually from their own making entirely. Remove the power of Brooklyn and it's elder system, and the cause for stumbling is removed with them too.

    Englishman.

  • Hmmm
    Hmmm

    Good post, Eman.

    I couldn't agree more with the sentiment that ye olde "I've been stumbled" claim is only dragged out to impose one's will on others. "Do things my way, or I'll say you stumbled me."

    I've even known it happen that a male has asked the PO to view the ministry record card of a sister, prior to him proposing marriage.

    In my area in the early '90s, brothers and sisters talking to the PO about a prospective mate's service time and meeting attendance almost became the norm. It was like going on a job interview!

    Hmmm

  • Sirona
    Sirona

    Excellent point!

    When I was a dub, I used to wonder about what they really meant by "stumbling" others. Sort of "so I can't do something thats OK for my conscience, because it would stumble someone else?"

    As you said, this is just a control tactic. All of the conscience matters are twisted to also be a potential stumbling block. E.g. if my conscience allowed me to have a couple of pints in the pub every night, I'd better watch that no JW sees me and I stumble him....or any interested person sees me.... oh well better not go.

    Sirona

  • Incense_and_Peppermints
    Incense_and_Peppermints

    Publishers, MS's, Elders, they all want the ear of the PO. In effect, many publishers become totally unable to make even the smallest decision without first of all contacting the PO

    Remove the power of Brooklyn and it's elder system, and the cause for stumbling is removed with them too.

    amen.

    Flanders: Reverend, I'm, uh, I'm afraid something terrible has
    happened.
    Lovejoy: Well, sit down and rap with me brother, that's what I'm here
    for.
    Flanders: [sits] I was talked into doing a dance called "The Bump,"
    but my hip slipped and my ... my buttocks came into contact
    with the ... buttocks of another young man.
    Lovejoy: [pause] I ... see.
    [voice-over] Then the calls began.
    [dissolve to shot of the Reverend at the dinner table, on
    the phone with Flanders]
    Flanders: Well, I, I think I may be coveting my own wife.
    [cut to shot of Reverend playing with a small train set]
    I'm meek but, I could probably stand to be meeker.
    [cut to shot of the Lovejoys in Paris]
    I, I ... I think I may have swallowed a toothpick.
    Lovejoy: Finally, I just stopped caring. Luckily, by then it was the
    Eighties, and no one noticed.

  • P
    P

    i was the wife of a MS and i decided to get highlights on my hair. i was 24. im standing at the KH before it started, doing the wifely duty of greeting everyone. the other wives were complementing my new hairstyle, when another MS asks to speak to me. he was very nice, asked how my day was, also complemented my new hairstyle, then asked me if my husband was aware that i was going to highlight my hair. i stated not really. he frowned and then asked me if i thought it was a good idea to do it. i frowned and asked him why he would ask me that. and his reply was, that i might stumble someone in the congregation. i dont remember what i told him, but it wasnt nice, or better yet, it wasnt "respectful" before his eyes, which in turn he spoke to my husband about.

    needless to say the car ride home was an argument on my sassy tongue and why i got highlights.

    i think there is more to life then drama over a hairstyle and stumbling any idiot JW.

  • larc
    larc

    I find this stumbling business to be amusing. Elders ask a brother why he is a hopeless drunk, and he says it is because he saw a brother at the pub drinking a beer and it stumbled him. Elders ask a brother why he was feeling up a sister, and brother says she was wearing a short skirt and she stumbled him. What a bunch of nonsense, and what poor excuses for not accepting personal responsibility for one's own behavior.

  • sleepy
    sleepy

    Stumbling was just an excuse to moan about people doing things you wanted to do but were afriad to in case jehovah lumped some lightening onto your head.

  • Francois
    Francois

    Hey Larc - see if you can top this. In my congo, a young brother confessed to having engaged in some homosexual contact with another brother and he blamed it all on the fact that he and the other brother had smoked some dope, that evil weed.

    Now, I've smoked a ton of dope in my life, and I never, and I mean NEVER, got the urge to get friendly wid no brutha.

    Francois

  • Amazing
    Amazing

    Hi E-Man:

    So what is all this about "being a cause for stumbling"? Surely, most JW's use this phrase purely as an excuse to manilpulate others or to suppress natural emotions and behaviour.

    Yes, spot on!!! or Right On as we Yanks say!!! A parallel phrase often used is "the Conscience of the Congregation" ... which we know is nothing more than the Elders who determine what that so-called conscience is according to their own whims. The congregation has no conscience, otherwise it would ditch the Elders, report the pedophiles, and tell the Watchtower to go to hell ... and then get on with living a meaningful life.

  • SpiceItUp
    SpiceItUp

    Good thread

    To stumble = To do something of your own control that is not accepted by the majority of the group

    To be stumbled = To accuse others of doing something you wish you had the guts to do yourself

    and thats my .02

    Spice of the purposely stumbling class

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