I'm back!!!!!

by Jesus Christ 53 Replies latest jw friends

  • Jesus Christ
    Jesus Christ

    Hi everyone. Jesus here. I'm sure you've probably read a few books about me in the past or at least about my dad, God (or as everyone back home likes to call him "Spanky").
    This is just a quick note to say that dad and I are back home now. Sorry we've been gone for so long, we went on a short vacation to an alternate universe ruled by one of dad's college buddies (some GREAT skeeball there!!!!!!) and have been gone for a few days. Its amazing what all you silly humans can get yourselves into while we're gone.
    Anyway, just wanted to say that the JW's are really a bunch of nutcases. How can they be witnesses to my father while we've been away for a while? He and I are in no way affiliated with them and apologize for any confusion.
    If you want or need anything you'll have to reply to me by this forum. While we were gone apparently Satan shut off our phone service and even though dad may be great and powerful, even he has to wait for the telephone repair guy to come. Thank dad that our net connection is over a satellite. I'll try to answer any questions you may have for me.
    Dad bless you!!!

  • SYN
    SYN

    AHAAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Damn, I nearly killed myself laughing when I saw a post by someone called "JESUS CHRIST"!!!!!!!!!

    That's Jesus H. Christ, isn't it?

  • MrMoe
    MrMoe

    OH MY GOD I AM RAORING WITH LAUGHTER!!!! That has got to be one of the funniest posts...

    Kisses,

    Moe - wating til Tuesday for Sprint to hook up her DSL, a shame I cannot pray to God/Dad for help with the dang phone company...

  • SYN
    SYN

    Check out Jesus' profile:

  • Valis
    Valis

    Jesus...I have a couple questions...if you didn't have sex w/women while on earth, why do thay all keep saying..Oh God! Oh Jesus! to us men? You and your dad must be pretty cool to engage in that kind of activity at the same time.....also Do you really save at Kroger?

    Sincerely,

    District Overbeer

  • DakotaRed
    DakotaRed

    Oh Jesus, and just when the party was getting to be fun!

  • Matty
    Matty

    Oh Lord, what a privilege it is for us to be witnesses to your return. Please can you inform us what it the true religion, the one that represents your interests here on Earth. Please don't say David Icke!

  • MrMoe
    MrMoe

    SYN -- I know right, omg, first post and already this Jesus Christ fellow is one of my favs!!!

    Kisses,

    Moe

    In The Jesus H. Christ Class

  • SYN
    SYN

    SPANKY????????

  • MrMoe
    MrMoe

    Jesus -- Who or what is REALLY behind AOL? And isn't Walmart cheaper? Is K-Mart really the stuff of life? Who IS Fred Hall? Is Bill Gates Satan? If he IS Satan, doesn't owning the Phone Company AND Microcrap also mean he is part of a monopoly? Just wondering...

    Kisses,

    Moe

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