Of course what they do not tell you is that often the same people have to trudge fifty miles to get a drink of beer.
HS
DO YOU APPRECIATE THE CONVENTIONS??
by minimus 20 Replies latest jw friends
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minimus
Do you really think these experiences are true? Or are they legends that gullible people want to believe??
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HoChiMin
I say, they are all BS legend, that they want to believe.
HCM
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truthseeker1
another vote for BS, see post above
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Matty
I love this one!
Watchtower 1st March 1998 "Why Do They Do It?"
Each year Jehovah's Witnesses around the world gather by the thousands at conventions. There, they enjoy fellowship and hear an excellent program of Bible instruction. Some make great efforts to attend these conventions. Last year, for example, in Malawi a couple in their mid-60's, along with their son and his wife and baby, traveled 50 miles [80 km] by bicycle to attend a convention. They left their village at six in the morning and arrived at the convention grounds 15 hours later.
In Mozambique, a group traveled three days by bicycle to get to a convention. One night, as they camped in the open, they heard lions roaring close by. Although they threw firewood in the direction of the animals, the lions stayed around until daybreak. Another Witness traveling to the same convention came face-to-face with a lion on the road. He stood quietly without moving until the lion went away. At the convention these Witnesses cheerfully told how they had been "delivered from the lion's mouth."-2 Timothy 4:17.
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expatbrit
"Psssst....Brother Mbalabomba, there's a lion in the bushes! You're an elder, tell us what to do!"
"I know, let's throw a piece of burning wood at it! That's sure to make it want to leave us alone!"
Anyway, I don't know why they worry about lions. No self-respecting lion would put up with all that sour meat.
Expatbrit
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minimus
I understand that the lion actually apologised for interrupting the brother while he was trying to get to the assembly and the brother rode on the lion's back so that he wouldn't miss the opening song and prayer. A circuit overseer told me so.
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The_Bad_Seed
I believe the lions name was Aslan, who, try as he might, was quite late getting the brother to the convention and ended up disturbing the opening talk -- then had the gall to stroll on the concourse level during the sessions, disturbing elderly and attendants alike!
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new boy
You forget the best part,
After they mention that, 90% of the time they use the the club on you. {guilt}
"And brothers what did you do to get here--------- get in air-condition cars?" You pieces of shit.
"ingorance is 100% curable"-------Jessie Cahill
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Bendrr
In Mozambique, a group traveled three days by bicycle to get to a convention. One night, as they camped in the open, they heard lions roaring close by. Although they threw firewood in the direction of the animals, the lions stayed around until daybreak. Another Witness traveling to the same convention came face-to-face with a lion on the road. He stood quietly without moving until the lion went away. At the convention these Witnesses cheerfully told how they had been "delivered from the lion's mouth."-2 Timothy 4:17.
Ok, I'll finish it.
"So Brother Matumbo, what happened to that lion?"
"Well Brother Bwana, that Lion was babtized this morning!"
And the crowd applauds mindlessly.
Come on! They've recycled these stories with the rest of the crap you hear at conventions. Some blind quadriplegic coma patient in a third world country crawled across two continents, braved a desert, floods, tornadoes, velociraptors, starvation, dehydration, terrorists, and a thermonuclear bomb exploding just so she could feast at Jehovah's spiritual table. I rank those stories right next to the Smurf legends. (come to think of it, once it was a smurf who went through all that in order to disrupt a Tuesday night Book Study somewhere in Africa. And that smurf was babtized this morning, brother! <mindless applause>)
Mike.