Why the chicken crossed the road.......

simplesally

- PAT BUCHANAN
To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.

- JERRY FALWELL
Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people see
the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the
"other side." That's what "they" call it the "other side." Yes, my
friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will
become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this
abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly
harmless phrase like "the other side." That chicken should not be
free to cross the road. It's as plain and simple as that.

- DR. SEUSS
Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes! The chicken crossed the road,
but why it crossed, I've never knowed!

- ERNEST HEMINGWAY
To die. In the rain.

- MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads
without having their motives called into question.

- GRANDPA
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone
told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough
for us.

- ARISTOTLE
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

- SADDAM HUSSEIN
This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified
in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

- RONALD REAGAN
What chicken?

- FOX MULDER
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens
have to cross before you believe it?

- FREUD
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the
road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

- BILL GATES
I have just released eChicken 2000, which will not only cross roads,
but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your
checkbook, and, Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.

- EINSTEIN
Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath
the chicken?

- BILL CLINTON
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by
chicken"? Could you define "chicken" please?

- LOUIS FARRAKHAN
The Road, you will see, represents the black man. The chicken
crossed the "black man" in order to trample him and keep him down.

- THE BIBLE
And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken,
"Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and
there was much rejoicing.

- COLONEL SANDERS
I missed one?

Faraon

:- COLONEL SANDERS
I missed one?

Maybe Browns Chicken got it

Nikita

Funny stuff, simplesally!

Doc_jedd

Exellent stuff! thanks..............Jedd

HomebutHiding

JW

The chicken crossed the road because he was working territory on the other side of the street.

StinkyPantz

Hehe. . funny. . .

nancee park

NOW PRESENTING: MORE OF WHY THE CHICK(EN) CROSSED THE ROAD FOR JEHOVAH'S WITNESSES AND FRIENDS.

As Ted Jarasc and his crowd in Brooklyn Watchtower headquarters might say if they dared or still had full clarity for talking about it instead of paying their lawyers to:

Friends, this is a bit elementary. That beloved chicken did not "cross" that road but definitely did use a "torture stake" to hop across it.

That chicken wanted to get to latest issue of the Watchtower magazine because he was so very very spiritual. He was a real chicken, a "Jehovah's" chicken!

Listen, friend. That chicken was a d----d apostate, and he knew he'd better fly across fast or we'd sick the congregation detective angels after him. You know, Jehovah's "evil" spirit like in the Hebrew scriptures. I bet our boys put a bug or two in his coop to listen in, and a transmitter or two to cricket chirp the living ---- out of him! Hahahahahahaha hahahahaha! Demons! Demons!

Well, you see, that chicken being a chicken was simply afraid of being disfellowshipped so he flew over the road. We see lots of chickens like that around Bethel headquarters every day, and once in a while some even jump off the roof... or whatever. Only the strong survive around here.

Hm. I believe the chicken was actually a rooster who wanted to become an Elder and later one of us Governing Body members over all the other local chickens so that he would really have something to crow about. But he wasn't discreet enough about it so got his head chopped off.

The chicken wasn't even a chicken but a poor little old pedophile who just had to move on to the next house to see what he just might spot there. Kind of like Leo Greenlees who was on the Governing Body and a pedophile in the 1980s. Didn't you know that?

Duh.... I'll have to phone our legal department. Surely they know why that stupid chicken had the nerve, the stupidity to do such a thing. But, you know, brother, the important question is, did he act before Armageddon? Just because it didn't come in 1874, 1914, 1918, 1922, 1940, 1984, 1994 means nothing. Jehovah's fury against such faithless chickens and their ilk is coming for sure and at any second. Still, I hate Kentucky Fried Chicken, especially if it's from Paducah, Kentucky and that Bill Bowen guy.

Listen!!! I don't know. Don't care. I'm too busy worrying about them women like Heidi and Erica coming after our printing presses. Just get the ---- out of here! Go talk to your table head!!

Sure. I know. It's not true. He never did cross the road. It was just a conspiracy the same as the Dateline NBC documentary and June 2002 Newsweek article which misrepresented us here at Bethel world headquarters over our being pro-pedophiles. Somebody took some pictures of the chicken but spliced and re-spliced them to make it look like he crossed over. Brothers, sisters, do you really think a chicken would cross a road all by itself? Don't be deceived. The media is part of Satan's conspiracy.

--------------

Feel free to email or mail the above Chicken Jokes to JWs, exJWs, talkative barbers, beauticians and anyone else you know.

Edited by - nancee park on 4 July 2002 22:1:3

plmkrzy

Siimplysally That was cute. Good chuckles from that one.Thanks for posting it.Plum

nancee park

Another:

What? The chicken crossed the road?? Were there TWO WITNESSES to this? Until such time as you bring forth two witnesses what you're saying must be considered a lie, slander. Did you hear me? I know what I'm saying. I'm an elder. Chicken crossing the road, indeed........

DakotaRed

Why did the chicken cross the road? To prove to the possum (armadillo in Texas) that it could be done.

Lew W

Why the chicken crossed the road.......

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