Mom - Why do you treat me like the damned!

by zenpunk 46 Replies latest jw friends

  • josephus
    josephus

    tough call blacksheep.

    i am glad im not in your shoes.

    just try to keep some chance for a reconcilliation open.

    best wishes

    josephus

  • BeautifulGarbage
    BeautifulGarbage

    "their just going to die in the end anyway so whats the point in trying"

    Such similiar words were spoken by my JW father when referring to my children.

    ((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

    To all that have posted on this thread.

    Andee

  • Double Edge
    Double Edge

    Hi everyone.... stick with me on this.....

    I get very sad when I read the above posts and try to imagine what you all go through. I'm one of the few non-JW's here, but have a JW friend that I'm trying to figure out. I know the best advice and support is given by those that experience the same thing, so I'm not trying to horn in. It's just that SHUNNING thing that drive me nuts, and is driving a wedge between my friend a me, because I come from a 'world' that thinks it's not very Christ-like. My JW friend and I got in a 'biblical' discussion. (I can hold my own with the scriptures. ) It finally came down to me saying, "You know, xxxxxx, I love the scriptures, but sometimes they seem to conflict, and when It comes down to it, I follow the scriptures taught by the Savior over the Apostles. Anything Christ said carries far more weight.... It boils down to Loving God and loving and forgiving your fellow man...and as Christ said, on that hangs all the laws and the prophets". Well, that set my 'biblical' JW friend off, but nothing could be said to combat it.

    NOW, I know I've never been a part of the JW world, I come from a very supportive family, so I admit to limited understanding, but let me ask you - for those of you that still believe in God what if you said to them (take a mother for an example):

    "Mom", I believe in God (Jehovah, whatever), I pray to Him, I know He listens and He knows I am seeking after His real Truth of this life. I appreciate all the good things you've done in raising me, but as surely as I'm talking to you now, someday we will both stand before our Creator - then you will know what I have said is true, then you will know that what really mattered in this life was what The Savior taught about love .... and you and everyone in this family that have turned their backs on me, will have to answer for all the sadness and divicivness you have brought about and the precious God-given time that you've squandered. Don't make me out as the one who has turned their back on God, because at that day, I know, regarding this, my hands will be clean".

    OK gang...don't be too rough on me....maybe I'm looking through rose-colored glasses....I just find it incredible that a parent or family member can be so cold to their flesh and blood. Something has got to get through to them that what they are doing is contrary to what God wants, and they will be held accountable...in fact they are punishing themselves now by not having you wonderful people in their lives.

    For those of you who doubt the existence of God...I guess that argument is moot.

    What are your thoughts....believe me, I'm just trying to understand...and I really feel for you all.

    One last thing, I noticed from a lot of posts that there is something 'positive' coming out of your experiences....for those with children (or those who'll have children), you're going to raise some great kids/adults....those with open minds....and when they are older and look back on their parents they are going to consider themselves to have been 'blessed'.

  • zenpunk
    zenpunk

    Hi Double Edge -

    The Watchtower Society can have an unbelievable mental hold on a person - these parents (like mine) literally feel that to interact with us can cost them their hope at everlasting life. I know that sounds hard to comprehend, but, as all these posts show, it's true. You see, those of us who knew "the truth" and then chose "the world" instead are worse than those, like yourself, who were never JWs.

  • Francois
    Francois

    Pandora,

    If I had been awarded custody of my two children, I would have done the same thing. However I wasn't. And by that time, my children already had a relationship with my parents so it would have made me as cruel as my parents are to cut off my children from them.

    I think this topic makes me madder than just about anything having to do with the JWs. But you know what? It doesn't make me stupid. Therefore I'll take the lumps and bumps, but I won't ever be a JW again, no matter what. And every chance I get, I will poke them in the eye. I'd say there are millions of people who feel this way. The witnesses are very good at shooting themselves through the foot, and this issue - in the end - is going to bite them right on the ass. And I'm gonna help.

    Francois

  • Billygoat
    Billygoat

    I think this topic makes me madder than just about anything having to do with the JWs. But you know what? It doesn't make me stupid. Therefore I'll take the lumps and bumps, but I won't ever be a JW again, no matter what.

    Amen! Amen! Amen!

  • imissthedub
    imissthedub

    ((((((to all of u who have experienced this))))))

    I too, have never been jw so I know this may sound pointless, but please know I sincerely mean it:

    I am so sorry to hear how you have been treated by your family. It actually makes me feel ill. You do NOT deserve this kind of treatment. Just know there are others who do care for you...or if you have just gotten out...that there WILL be friends and family who sincerely care regardless of what you believe. People here on this site are a good place to start.

  • Sangdigger
    Sangdigger

    I can definately sympathize with everyone. I too have experienced this treatment. Even though i have not recieved a "label" from the org.,(i was one of those ones who "slipped through the cracks" in the system) i told my cousin to read the bible often, and he didnt have to attend JW meetings to be saved. This spread like wildfire among the family, bringing on some heated debates over the phone, and for the first time when visiting my parents (i live 3 hours away) i was denied access to their home and had to get a motel in the same town with my wife and daughter. Amazing!! I have a sister thats working on her second illigitimate child, runs around with a bad crowd does drugs, and has a drinking problem, and a brother who never works, and has joined the masonic lodge, and even lived with a woman in my parents basement for a while, and both of them are living at my parents home. But because neither of them are baptized, its tolerated, and because i was (at age 15) im not allowed to even spend the night. Simply because i dont agree with them doctrinally.

    Dont get me wrong, i dont mean to judge my brother and sister, I would do ANYTHING for them. Im not asking to be treated any better than them, just to be given the same love. But because of a LEGAL TECHNICALITY, thats the way it is. Actually, things (conversation wise) have improved over the last 2 weeks. They are letting my daughter stay there, and even sent an anniversary card. But im not holding my breath too long. In anger, i even quoted Matt.10:34-36 to my father. Of course, he sees it in reverse.

  • bitter mango
    bitter mango

    (((punky)))

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    First of all (((HUGS))) to all of you who have suffered at the hands of the WTS and parents who shun you. I know how it feels because I am a victim of it too.

    As a parent I don't think I could do it which makes it harder for me to understand how my mother can. I think Blondie had it right - the WTS attracts abusive people. It fits their mentality. No real love and no conscience.

    Second - if you are a person who needs to talk about this but feels too insecure about an open forum I have set up a private discussion forum for people who need to talk and share. Please email me if interested.

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