OMG, I’m gonna get Old and Die.

by John Aquila 76 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • LoveUniHateExams

    I now realise life is hopeless. I hate life. I can't wait to die but don't want to end it myself - please try not to think like this, punkofnice.

    There's no eternal life but dry to focus on positive, happy things. There may not be a grand purpose but life is not pointless. I get down sometimes and similar thoughts pour into my head, but I'm trying hard to make something of my life by studying at uni. I've worked hard and will be graduating in 6 weeks' time.

    Do you have a hobby that you're interested in and takes up your time?

    From what I remember reading on another thread you mentioned you want to become a writer. How's that going?

    Have you thought about returning to education?

    All the best


  • GrreatTeacher

    I realized this while sitting on the front porch steps after burying my pet cat who didn't look before she crossed the street. A breeze was blowing softly and birds were singing.

    I realized that I too would die one day and the sun would still come up, and the breeze would blow, and the birds would still sing.

  • punkofnice
    LoveUniHateExams22 minutes agoI now realise life is hopeless. I hate life. I can't wait to die but don't want to end it myself - please try not to think like this, punkofnice.

    Thanks. I've just bloody well had enough of stuff. I would like to run away....nowhere to run and no funds to do it.

    I just want peace and it's not going to happen. My family will see to that!

  • millie210

    punk - if misery loves company then you have a lot of good company on these threads!

    Currently my brother is not speaking to me. My crime? I havent gone to a meeting since Memorial.

    This is my only fleshly brother and we went through a lot of hardships growing up. I was a few years older and I saved his little butt many times. (sad smile here)

    Our parents are dead and that leaves just us sharing the old genetic code so to speak.

    But because of something Im not doing. Im dead to him.

    I guess because I would/could never do this to him it makes it hard to accept.

    John Aquila - You start such interesting threads.

    My thought is this: if we had stayed JWs and labored on and died of old age, would we be any better off than we are? No.

    So we are ahead of the game compared to some. Perhaps behind some people in other ways but with more appreciation for how this game (life) is played.

    That in itself is a gift and gives us an edge.

  • punkofnice
    millie2102 minutes agopunk - if misery loves company then you have a lot of good company on these threads!

    Sorry to hear that Millz. That's typical of the WBT$ mind control.

    Those sods owe me my life back...and money.

  • mrquik

    I know it amounts to heresy, but I'm going to say it anyway. I don't believe every thing I learned as a JW was wrong. I know too I will die. (A real shock) I run all my current beliefs against whether or not it makes sense to me. A resurrection & life in Paradise? Yeah, I can agree with that. And if I'm wrong? It won't really matter, will it? So I'm going to finish out my life with that prospect. To that end; Live Well....Enjoy Life !

  • millie210

    You are just as likely to be right as anyone else mrquik

    but I have a suspicion you will enjoy the journey either way.

    raising a glass to you!

  • DesirousOfChange

    When it finally clicked,............

    . . . . . it was a rude awakening. I truly had believed all the BS. I thought my family, my parents, my grandparents, etc would all make it (somehow by God's HS) through the GT and live forever in Paradise. It was my mind's eye.

    My grandparents I thought were just too old and/or in too poor of health to make it "through" but we'd welcome them back on the "other side". After all, Grandma died refusing blood after surgery. She'd taken her stand for Jehovah. They were born in the late 1800's, so not necessarily included in "the generation". Then my dad died. All those years smoking while out of The Truth(tm). And now, when I finally wake up to TTATT, my wife & I are already old and seeing the effects of it -- health declining, etc.

    All those hours, days, weeks, YEARS spent wasting our time knocking on doors, preparing & going to worthless meetings, assemblies, conventions, etc etc etc. F&cking YEARS wasted on the hampster wheel, trying to go faster.


    There was a period of sadness over the loss, but mostly I've been ANGRY. Angry at me for being so gullible and stupid and blind. And extremely resentful and angry at the men who concocted and promoted the horrible scam. They are WICKED.

    Did it take weeks to recover, or months, or years, or are you still recovering and see no end in sight?

    I don't think I've recovered yet. I don't know if I (or anyone) really can. You simply cannot go back and regain what has been taken away. I've wondered if counseling/therapy would help, although I doubt that most counselors would even be able to understand the feelings and thus doubtful they could help. It would really take someone with an expertize in Cults.

    As a friend here frequently reminds us: It is a Cult.


  • freemindfade
    I had actually already been feeling that way, and there was more of peace that came over me
  • kairos

    There are many older ones in my area where I used to attend the meetings.

    I have been watching as they slowly die off before me. Seems like about 3-4 a year die.
    Just in the last few years there have been 4 elders and one MS that have died in my old hall alone.

    This does not seem to alarm the JWs that are still in.

    I would say there are at least 10 more in my old hall alone, that if they they died today, it would surprise no one. I noticed this and here I am... Approaching 50 with an older wife and that's it.

    I have many very diverse and fulfilling interests that keep me going.

    JWs embrace the LIE that death is not normal and they can cheat it.
    The longer you stay indoctrinated, the more time you are wasting.
    Time that you can never get back. Don't live on death row, get out and live!!

Share with others