If you masturbate, your hand will get pregnant! Religious ratbaggery is universal

by fulltimestudent 12 Replies latest jw friends

  • fulltimestudent
    fulltimestudent

    The JW org. used to claim (and probably still does) that masturbation would turn you into a homosexual. They, of course, failed to explain the process by which that happened and since masturbation is likely a near universal practice, the claim fails the test of logic, as homosexuality is not the majority form of sexuality.

    But over in the Islamic world, an equally illogical claim is made.

    Mücahid Cihad Han, a Turkish televangelist

    was answering viewers' questions on 2000 TV on 24 May when one asked him about masturbation.

    The viewer said he 'kept masturbating, although he was married, and even during the Umrah', the piligrimage to Mecca performed by Muslims.

    In the bizarre response, Han insisted Islam strictly bans masturbation.

    'One hadith states that those who have sexual intercourse with their hands will find their hands pregnant in the afterlife, complaining against them to God over its rights,' he said, referring to what he claimed to be a saying of Prophet Muhammad.

    'If our viewer was single, I could recommend he marry, but what can I say now?' the televangelist added, advising the viewer to 'resist Satan’s temptations'.

    The claim has been widely criticized on Turkish and other media. He has also received criticism in the past for calling homosexuality 'evil' and 'the worst of all sins'.

    Many have commented how only a very limited number of Islamic interpretations forbid masturbation, with many just consdering it something to be frowned upon. Many mainstream Islamic interpretations even allow it, such as using it to avoiding cheating on your spouse.

    'Are there any hand-gynaecologists in the afterlife? Is abortion allowed there?' one Twitter user asked.

    - See more at: http://www.gaystarnews.com/article/men-who-masturbate-will-find-their-hands-pregnant-afterlife-anti-gay-televangelist-warns2605#sthash.nXxdJJj7.2asOZrlY.dpuf

  • JWdaughter
    JWdaughter

    This is why I don't hold hadith in any particular esteem. I will take wisdom where I find it and when it looks ridiculous, I figure that the "saying" came about when it suited someone, long, long ago who was trying to get his kid to stop masturbating.

    Its kind of how I view the Bible. Sayings, not particularly inspired. There may be some really good stuff, there may be some really true teachings, but it is all sayings that made the cut somewhere along the line.

    FYI, hadith are not considered in any way inspired. Many give them (selectively, as they are wont to be selective) too much influence. I think a lot of the nonsense hadith were put in there to inspire a desired action by someone who wasn't otherwise compliant-until they are told that "the prophet said it to. .. .(someone respected who allegedly repeated it). Stupid game of telephone gone wild.

  • WTWizard
    WTWizard
    All bogus. It will not make you go blind. It will not make hair grow on your palms. It will not make someone gay that isn't already. This is why Judaism, Christi-SCAM-ity, and Islam need to be abolished before they together abolish common sense.
  • Finkelstein
    Finkelstein

    This is what happens when people today in these modern times try to emulate the social moral standards of civilizations that existed thousands of years ago, by reading ancient texts scribed out of human ignorance

    Someone is going to get hurt.

  • Vidiot
    Vidiot

    "... the televangelist added, advising the viewer to 'resist Satan’s temptations'."

    Typical.

    Anything that feels good must be "Satan's Temptations".

  • LoveUniHateExams
    LoveUniHateExams

    My hands won't get pregnant, that's for God-damned sure. I toss myself off regularly 3 times a week but I always make sure I'm wearing gloves

  • punkofnice
    punkofnice

    Once again the unintelligent fundy dumbos show how utterly stupid they are. Give a monkey control of it's environment and it'll fill the world with bananas.

    Give a pig headed fundy control.....no world left.

  • 3rdgen
    3rdgen

    "Give a monkey control of its enviornment and it'll fill the world with bananas." LOL

    Punky, I'm SO glad you're back!

  • 3rdgen
    3rdgen
    Uh oh, I thought my hands had completed Menopause.
  • punkofnice
    punkofnice
    ...and I thought the term 'wanker' was appropriate for this idiotic muslim fundy.

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