What was your crisis (page 3)

Soledad

For me it was boredom. I was bored with the meetings, bored with field service, bored of the fake personalities, the fake smiles, the faked "happiness," bored with the ASSemblies, in short, just bored!

jst_me

The Blood issue in Bulgaria. That just blew me away. I had been df'd, but was going to all the meetings, and still thought it was "the truth" till I saw that.

I went to my last circuit assembly right around the same time. This member of the GB, who was old and could hardly stand let alone speak, had a part. They treated him like the pope, or a rock star or something. It was DISGUSTING. I told my mom that was it, and she agreed that it was wrong, but I guess she could handle it. I couldnt.

eyegirl

i don't know if i really had a crisis. after i left home, i felt such freedom and learned that the world around me was bigger than just the organization i grew up in. i stopped going to meetings and got ratted out by a 'friend' that was recently reinstated. i guess that was a good thing--didn't have to break it to my parents that i wasn't going anymore. i finally got to the point that i refused to be a hypocrite any longer. i liked going to bars, i liked drinking, i liked partying--i liked all the 'bad' things that i wasn't allowed to do while being a 'good' witness. i was reunited with my sister after 15 years (she was df'd when i was 8). my older brother also left, and now the 3 of us are an unbreakable unit. it's so amazing to finally know what unconditional love is and know that no matter what you have someone there to support and love you. i'm almost brought to tears right now just thinking about how much happier i am today.

Soledad

Thanks for sharing that eyegirl Welcome

Lady Lee

well I had been DFed for about 10 years and like a dummy stilled believed they had the truth - it was just my congregation that was rotten.

A girlfriend of mine had some questions about the JWs and since I had thrown all my books and stuff away I wound up doing a bit of research. What a gut-wrenching mind-blowing experience that was.

I learned about Malawi and Mexico and the money - all the money. Just destroyed my whole belief system.

Had to start from scratch and figure out my truth from all that

Thanks especially to Randy and Tim Cambell for their excellent sites that woke me up out of my stupor

A not-so-silent lamb

Aspire to inspire before you expire

Panda

This is a terrific thread... very helpful.

For me it definitely had to be an education that started the end. But then I remember being bored out of my mind at meetings and assemblies.I remember the first time about 1985 when I made no attempt to hide my dislike of sitting all day long in the Astrodome (now torn down for ENRON field HA!) I was just like please please end this torment. I remember around 1990 maybe 1989 too, I would make plans to go to someother convention in the summer just to maybe be revived by change. That was a failure. Then college... It didn't take long to figure out why jws are discouraged ,ney ordered to stay away from those evil institutions of education.

And then oneday at lunch:
My friend Lisa and I were discussing evolution (we were both in engineering and were talking about our chemistry class) so we talked about theory of this or that and I said but the theory of evolution was unproven and Lisa said "everything in science is a theory, but that doesn't mean it's a fantasy." Then I thought about what I was learning and realized how right she was about theories. I started to read what I could on evolution, and realized that like the theory of matter, the theory of light , the theory of quantum mechanics...wow ...the light just came streaming in and I really was free.
Thanks again for this discussion. It is very healing.

dyan4help

After 25 years as a witness, though not always an active witness, my husband passed away leaving me with two small children to raise. This was my crisis and I turned to the witnesses for comfort and support as I have no close family because I was a witness.My PO and his wife called me and came to my house and sat with me and the children at the hall to support me in my time of need. Then the life insurance check came and my PO asked me to invest the money in building our new kingdom hall and the society would give my money back. Then he brought me a contract, because that is how Jehovah wants money matters handled, but it was for him to borrow the money and he would have it back before the witnesses needed it. After he got the money he started showing up at my house with a 12 pack of beer under his arm making sexual advances towards me. Two other brothers got wind of this and they started visiting me too. Sometimes at the same time. We all sat on the front porch because my children were not used to people drinking and getting drunk around them. Anyway, a sister who lives up the street spotted the brothers at my house and word got back to the elders who called me in for a meeting. I was told to deny everything by the PO. I told everything. To make a long story short, I was told I would not get my money back, I told them I would sue, they said I could not do that to Jehovah's name. I ended up disfellowshipped. The PO had to step down and he filed bankrupcy on me. He was reproved and is in good standing. When I questioned the elders about his good standing, giving them bible verses about liers and theives and money matters and taking care of widows and the fatherless boys and showing them articles in the watchtowers about this, the new PO said to me that I could research all I want in the watchtowers and the bible, they don't go by these things. They have their own set of books and rules they use. So much for religion.

Dyan

JG

My own, hmm It is hard to say, first feelings of probs with the witness' would be that I was treated as a lower life form at work. The manager was a witness half or more of the crew were also. Every tues and thurs 10 - 20 from the hall would come in and have coffee. I was looked down on and talked down to. I thought Nice come right from "church" and act like this?? Where is the love that I hear and see when I go to my church. Well that was what raised my eyebrows and then when I started dating my wife I started hearing things that aren't in the Bible I read. and so began my studies.

Thanks to all here.
Sean

d

The lies and after a while I could not take the lies.

Amelia Ashton

My crisis of conscience happened in Spain after being counselled by an elder against helping African boat people (refugees, mainly women with babies).

I was told not to offer material help but only Bible Studies as they might come into the truth for the wrong reasons.

It was not an epiphaneous moment but it niggled and nagged until I allowed myself to know this was not Christ's messsage of love.

What was your crisis

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